In August, I volunteered at my daughter’s former elementary school, handing out back-to-school packets. Excitement and anxiety blurred the halls as kids and parents made their way to classrooms.
In the commotion, a boy now taller than me came up and asked, “Do you remember me?” “Of course I do,” I exclaimed as a smile came across his face. “Wow,” he said. “You always planned the best class parties. I miss those,” he said as he walked down the hall with his now fifth-grade sister.
With a list of volunteer opportunities in front of me, I am drawn to help at my daughter’s elementary school rather than at her middle school. From knowing the lasting impact I have to giving my daughter space in her teen years, I have many reasons why.
School gives me a place to connect
For my husband and me, our families are mainly in the Midwest and on the Carolina coast, making the daily ups and downs of parenting fall entirely on our shoulders.
The more time I spend in the school building, the more comfortable I feel leaning on staff in the been-there-done-that parenting environment.
Whether a teacher asks how my daughter is doing or sees I’m digging out of difficult conversations, I know they are “family” I can go to.
Volunteering helped me honor my parents
Looking back to my elementary years, my mother is central to those memories, volunteering any way she could. Meanwhile, my dad was always the one grabbing the catcher’s mitt to warm up the pitcher or donating his time to the Lions Club and other local organizations.
My parents always stressed that the best way to say thank you is with your time. After losing my mom suddenly in February, giving my time has become even more important to me. Every mailbox I stuff, email I send, or event I volunteer at helps me feel close to her.
I’m hanging on to my OG mom friends
There is something to be said about your original parenting friends, the ones you make when you begin a whole new chapter in your life. In the case of beginning motherhood away from family in a new town, those first friends met at story time, play gyms, and more, and became my first natural friends.
Opportunities to connect with OG friends are becoming fewer and farther between as our kids grow up and head in new directions. For now, volunteering at the elementary school gives me a chance to connect with some of the OGs without having to schedule something months in advance. Yes, some of the volunteer mom faces I see are slowly changing at the school, but for now it still remains a place that feels familiar and comfortable to me
Volunteering has led to some work
When my daughter was in preschool, I started volunteering weekly to help build a bridge between the teachers and me. Without physically walking around with my résumé, I found it natural to strike up conversations with teachers in the hall and in the workroom about my past teaching experience.
I quickly became a preferred sub, so I often get texts saying, “Hey, are you available on such and such date to sub?” Without wanting to go back to teaching full time, subbing lets me still get my teacher fix but also the flexibility of time to pursue other interests.
With limited opportunities to volunteer and make an impact at the middle school level, I will continue to volunteer at my daughter’s former elementary school. Whether I’m sharing my passion for hiking and guidebooks with students or handing out packets at back-to-school night, I fill my cup during school hours without missing time with my daughter.
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