Imagine matching with a man on a dating app who claims to be a San Francisco 49ers wide receiver and a successful real estate developer from Switzerland.
He shows you account balances in the millions of dollars and promises to build a prosperous future with you.
You decide to check him out by Googling his name. The search results seem to confirm his story.
But then you find out it was a complete fabrication.
According to a federal criminal complaint unsealed in Oregon in August, 35-year-old Daejon Labrayae Love wasn’t an athlete and was not a wealthy investor.
Federal authorities allege he was a serial fraudster who, alongside an 18-year-old co-conspirator posing as his financial adviser, cheated at least 26 women in Oregon, Washington, Idaho and California out of about $1.3 million. The FBI said in a release about the case that it believes there are many more victims, most of whom Love met through online dating apps. Their alleged schemes date back to at least February 2022.
Some of the women saved his video messages and communications. In one clip obtained by TMZ, he pulled out what he said was a key to a $340,000 Lamborghini, holding up a ring of car keys he said were collectively worth about $1 million.
According to prosecutors, all of the bragging — along with displays of luxury watches, designer clothing, and claims of owning several multimillion-dollar homes — was intended to make his story believable and to convince the women that their money was safe with him because he was uber-rich.
Love currently does not have an attorney. According to a spokesperson for the U.S. attorney’s office in Oregon, he remains in the custody of the U.S. Marshals Service while awaiting transport from Idaho to Portland, Oregon, for his initial court appearance, where an attorney will be appointed.
Love is charged with wire fraud and conspiracy to commit wire fraud. The 47-page complaint alleges elaborate investment schemes to defraud numerous women.
To gain their trust, the complaint says, women were shown screenshots of account balances that falsely indicated an increased value of their investments.
According to the complaint, one woman was scammed out of $87,500, including $30,000 paid to break a lease on a $250,000 McLaren sports car. Love allegedly persuaded the woman to help him lease the vehicle.
Some of the women even loaned Love large sums of money, with the promise that their investment returns would more than cover the debt. When others didn’t have enough cash to invest, they were coached on how to take out personal loans, according to the complaint.
I know what many of you are thinking right now: How could these women be so gullible?
Having covered cons for years, I’m not surprised that much of the commentary on this case has been critical of the women.
Sports commentator Stephen A. Smith weighed in on his YouTube channel. “This unbelievable,” he said. “I’m not laughing about it, because it ain’t funny to know that women got swindled.”
He added: “But I guess some of you are lonely, huh?”
While claiming to have “compassion,” Smith, in his typically animated fashion, pointed out, like a Monday-morning quarterback, that he would have noticed that Love’s workout videos weren’t credible.
“Clearly, there are a lot of you women out there who don’t watch football,” he said. “Because, if you watch football, it ain’t hard to see that brother was no NFL player. If you watch the videos that he put out there with him working out, it’s real easy to see he ain’t an NFL player.”
Social media comment sections were even harsher.
On Instagram, one user reacted to a video of Love catching a football on the beach in a 49ers helmet: “The fact he took that helmet everywhere was the first [flag]. I laughed 10 minutes straight when I saw the videos. Women, if you fell for that, please seek counseling.”
On Reddit, another commenter posted: “No offense to the women who are hurting, but I literally cannot fathom how this could happen to you in 2026.”
When someone opens a sentence with “no offense,” an insult invariably follows.
These knee-jerk comments mocking women who say they have been scammed are cruel and fail to recognize how insidious such schemes can be.
According to the FBI’s Internet Crime Complaint Center, reported losses in 2025 to confidence and romance scams surged to more than $929 million, up from $672 million in 2024.
Romance scams succeed because predators systematically manipulate people’s emotions. Consider the psychological and technical traps Love is accused of using.
He told the women that they could build a life together.
“Love convinced many of his victims that they were in sincere romantic relationships with him and that he was financially savvy and successful to gain their trust,” the complaint said.
The FBI said he created a fake digital footprint.
Investigators noted that searches for Love’s name in early 2026 returned results and AI summaries that sometimes incorrectly identified him as a 49ers player.
Scammers use apps and AI to create fake documents that look incredibly authentic. In one video sent to a woman, Love allegedly showed a statement indicating that he had an account balance of more than $30 million, the FBI said.
I’ve reported on financial fraud for years, and if there is one universal truth, it’s this: Even the most cautious, analytical people can be conned when trust and affection are weaponized against them.
Federal law enforcement agencies, including the FBI and the Federal Trade Commission, stress that official figures represent only a fraction of actual losses. Because of shame, fear of judgment and the emotional trauma caused by these cons, officials believe many victims never report being cheated.
The relentless public ridicule of scam victims exacerbates the problem. Shaming keeps them silent.
On this point, Smith is correct. Romance scams are no laughing matter.
Here’s advice I’ve given before that I hope you will share.
If you or a loved one has been scammed, call the AARP Fraud Watch Network helpline at 877-908-3360 or go online at aarp.org/fraudhelpline.
The AARP Fraud Victim Support Group provides an online forum for scam victims. Group sessions are confidential and led by trained facilitators. They are also open to friends and family; go to aarp.org/fraudsupport.
Coming forward can be difficult if you have been victimized, but it’s important to notify law enforcement. File a complaint with the Federal Trade Commission at ReportFraud.ftc.gov and the FBI’s Internet Crime Complaint Center at ic3.gov.
The post Why mocking romance-fraud victims only keeps more people in silence appeared first on Washington Post.
