If you were conscious at all during the late ’80s and mid-’90s, there’s a fairly decent chance that you’ve heard the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles theme song at some point, whether it was your intention to do so or not. In case you need a reminder, it literally starts with the words “Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles.” Then it repeats them twice to make sure you understood. Refresh your memory below, if you must.
So, that little ditty you just listened to, or some variation of it, is what kids (and their poor parents) heard over and over again at the beginning of every episode of the original Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles animated series. Spun off from the 1984 comic book series of the same name, the animated Ninja Turtles ran from 1987 to 1996 for a total of 193 episodes. The theme was subsequently used in a number of Turtle-related projects, including the newer movies starring Megan Fox (and, obviously, the Ninja Turtles).
Here’s the really interesting thing about all this: The guy who wrote those immortal words that are now stuck in all of our heads is also the guy who created Two and a Half Men. To save you some time, that person is none other than Chuck Lorre, who’s also responsible for sitcoms like The Big Bang Theory, Mike & Molly, Mom, and Young Sheldon. Lorre was trying to make it as a songwriter in the late ’80s but didn’t have much success. It was at that time that he brought a box of his recordings to singer Harry Nilsson, who told Lorre he’d kill him if he ever came to his house again.
Lorre had a little luck with a song called “French Kissin,” which was covered by Debbie Harry and became her highest-charting hit in the UK. Then he landed the gig for the Ninja Turtles and was given just 48 hours to complete the song on a $2,000 budget. Lorre and writing partner, Dennis Challen Brown quickly read through the old comic books for inspiration and got a demo made in the same studio that Journey had been using to record an album (which would’ve had to be 1986’s Raised on Radio). The finished theme was sung by James Mandell, with Lorre doing the speaking parts.
Despite the animated series being a huge international hit, Lorre and his writing partner didn’t receive royalties from any of the millions of video games and VHS tapes sold that contained their song. The publisher’s reasoning? They didn’t want to pay them.
But suddenly the fact that Charlie Sheen’s character on Two and a Half Men was a jingle writer makes a lot more sense, eh? Lorre evidently wrote what he knew—including what he knew about Charlie Sheen on top of that.
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