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Dyan Cannon has tried it all — but it was her deep faith in God that gave her lasting peace in Hollywood.
The actress is the co-host of a new podcast, “God’s Table Hollywood,” which features faith-based conversations about finding purpose. The 88-year-old told Fox News Digital that, looking back, she struggled to find meaning in her life before becoming a proud “God girl.”
“My main seeking has been to understand why I’m here, to understand who I really am,” she said. “Not to fit in necessarily, and not to stand out necessarily. But to understand. And in understanding, there’s been freedom for me, and that’s what we try and talk about on the podcast.”
“Is it always easy? No. Life isn’t easy,” she reflected. “So how do we deal with that? How do we get through that? Well, I’ve tried everything. I’ve tried drugs. I’ve tried men. I’ve tried pills. I’ve tried everything. But they were like a Band-Aid that didn’t stick when I started to sweat. So, I had to find a platform, a faith, or a sounding board, something to stand on and base my thinking on. One that doesn’t change.”
“Faith has helped me with my emotional life,” she continued. “I used to expect a man to make me happy. Can you believe that? I used to think that was his job, to make me happy. That’s … impossible. A lot of things have radically changed in my life because of the way I’ve learned to rethink it.”
“There’s just one word to me that represents God and that is Love,” she said. “That’s capital L. Not little l that comes and goes, but capital Love that remains the same.”
Still, it hasn’t been easy for Cannon to be outspoken about her faith.
“In the past, I lost friends because of it,” she admitted. “So-called friends. They weren’t really friends. And maybe even some work because of it. But I think the city of angels — Los Angeles — better decide whose angels they are.”
“We have an episode about how we met God,” she said. “Mine starts with how I met him on the Universal lot. I was about 22 and his name was Cary Grant, because that was God to me at the time. I was trying to find my way in the world.”
“I don’t think wisdom necessarily comes with age,” she said. “I don’t think you have to grow old to understand life. I think wisdom comes with seeking. And I was seeking truth.”
Before they married, Grant persuaded Cannon to try LSD, the Los Angeles Times reported in 2011. When their marriage began to break down, Cannon took the psychedelic drug with him several times. According to numerous books and documentaries about Grant, the actor credited LSD for helping him address his childhood traumas.
“He thought it was a gateway to God,” she told the outlet. “He thought it was going to help him find peace.”
“I knew I shouldn’t do it, but I did it to please him and to save our marriage,” she told the outlet at the time about using the drug. “But I kept saying, ‘How is this going to help me find God? How is this going to help you find God?’ He didn’t force me to take it. I said, ‘Yes.’”
The outlet noted that after their divorce, Cannon attempted to ease her pain with pills and marijuana. She suffered a breakdown and ended up, as she said, “in the nut house.”
“I was locked up,” she told the outlet. “Most of my best friends didn’t know about it.”
Faith has always been part of Cannon’s life. Her mother was Jewish and her father Christian. Over the years, her relationship with God has been an anchor during life’s ups and downs, she noted.
“Faith isn’t always easy to practice,” she told Fox News Digital. “But it’s a platform for me to stand on when the world changes, and we’re put to the test.”
When asked what advice she would give to her younger self — the one who just met Grant and had no idea how her life would transform from that relationship — she laughed and said, “Snap out of it.”
“We had wonderful times together,” she said. “[But] had I been able to go back and live it differently, I would’ve. I’m not as patient with myself as I used to be.”
Cannon previously told Fox News Digital that these days, she’s embracing the single life.
“It took me a long time to learn how to be happy by myself because I really thought I was incomplete without a man in my life,” she said.
“I was raised to think that you marry, you have children and that’s what makes a happy life. And in my case, it wasn’t. But I’ve learned how to be happy alone. There’s great freedom in that because then you don’t settle for the broken set of dishes. You’re not with somebody just because you’re lonely. You’re not with someone just because you’re afraid to be alone.”
WATCH: DYAN CANNON CLEARS THE AIR ON ‘FRIENDS WITH BENEFITS’
“I’m absolutely open to dating,” Cannon continued. “There’s no one in my life right now that I’m dating, but I have two rescue puppies, and they’re great company, and I have wonderful friends. Should the right one come along, I think [that will be] a real blessing to have.”
While Cannon is open to finding love again, she doesn’t envision herself saying “I do” once more.
“I was forced to give up my career in marriage,” she said. “And looking back, I don’t think I would do that again. I would not want to trade one for the other. But I think it’s possible when you’re with somebody who really supports you and loves you to manage both.”
“I think we all have to be true to … our highest sense of right, not listen so much to what the world says we should be doing. … When I am in line with that, I’m fine. And when I go against that, I mess it up badly. … I don’t know if I’d want to get married again, but I would love to be able to sit down with somebody and hold hands and talk about the things that are important in life. I like that idea.”
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