Japanese behavioral ecologist Leo Uesaka stuck tiny cameras on seabirds and accidentally discovered something truly majestic: streaked shearwaters, a type of seabird common in Japan, poop a lot. Like, a whole lot. And they do it in mid-air.
Uesaka’s original plan was to observe how these ocean-gliding birds sprint across the water before takeoff. But what dominated the footage wasn’t the elegant flapping of wings; it was relentless, airborne defecation. “The frequency of the excretion is far more than I expected,” he admitted.
These birds drop bombs every four to ten minutes, up to five times an hour. Researchers estimate they eject around 5 percent of their body weight in s**t per hour. That’s like a human shedding 9 pounds of crap on the freeway every hour without stopping the car, because presumably it’s a Flintstone car situation with a lot of open air access.
This Seabird Poops Constantly, According to a Japanese Researcher
The most impressive part is that they rarely poop while resting on the water. Scientists think it’s either a cleanliness issue, a predator-avoidance tactic, or perhaps floating while pooping feels uncomfortable. They would be stewing in it. Better to poop on the move to get it away from you rather than all over you.
Beyond the comedy, though, there’s a legitimate ecological interest here. All this excrement is fertilizer. Bird poop is packed with nitrogen and phosphorus, which means these mid-flight evacuations are likely enriching ocean ecosystems in the same way that whale poop (and pee!) is so healthy for our oceans that scientists are dumping nutrient-packed synthetic whale poop into the sea to revitalize ailing ocean systems.
Coral grows faster near bird-rich islands. Fish populations spike. If seabird poop is an unsung marine superfood, the streaked shearwater is the animal equivalent of the World’s Central Kitchen, feeding the world one dump at a time, several times a day.
Speaking to the New York Times, Dr. Ruth Dunn, who studies how other seabirds like red-footed boobies hunt, notes that if shearwaters tend to fly over the same areas, they might be inadvertently shaping ocean ecology just by sticking to their routine pooping/flight paths.
Next, Uesaka wants to use cameras and GPS tracking systems to see where these aerial poop barrages are landing. The hope is to map the full ecological impact of this fecal powerhouse of a bird, and maybe turn its a**hole into the new frontier of animal research.
The post Scientist Discovered a Seabird That Basically Never Stops Pooping appeared first on VICE.
