The holiday season is certainly not the most wonderful time of the year for everyone. In fact, it can bring more stress, financial strain, and emotional burnout than joy.
However, with the right approach, you can find a balance that allows you to still enjoy the season—no matter how much you relate to Ebenezer Scrooge.
(Take it from me—I used to hate the holidays, but I caught myself listening to a Christmas playlist while decorating my tree with a holiday ambiance on my TV this weekend.)
Set Healthy Boundaries
While this piece of advice is becoming a bit overused, it’s highly recommended for a reason.
During the holidays, you might be asked—or expected—to attend events you don’t want to. From parties and dinners to trips and gift exchanges… all while balancing work and other commitments. When you’re facing a packed schedule, don’t be afraid to say “no” to plans that either stress you out or don’t bring you joy.
Put yourself first this holiday season—and gift yourself some well-deserved rest and relaxation. This will ensure you’re actually present and in your best headspace when you do say “yes” to the right occasions.
Surround Yourself With Good People
I love my alone time—and require a lot of it after social events—but I’ve found that the right people don’t drain my energy nearly as quickly as the wrong people. When I don’t need to pretend to be someone I’m not or do something I don’t actually want to do, I find myself craving the company of others during the holidays. Being choosy with your social circle is not a bad thing.
On the other hand, the holidays can also be an isolating time of the year that reminds us of those we’ve lost or those who live far away.
“Loneliness and isolation can feel exacerbated during the holiday season when you look around and it seems like everyone’s getting together and you don’t have plans, or you’re not looking forward to your plans,” Shilagh Mirgain, a psychologist at UW Health in Madison, Wisconsin, told AP News.
If you want to be social this season, consider inviting loved ones to festive events, such as cooking Christmas cookies with your friends, attending a tree lighting with your partner, or even just watching holiday movies with your family. These simple activities can get you in the spirit without breaking the bank or requiring too much of your social battery.
Additionally, “There’s so much opportunity to give back during this time, and I think generosity is one of the best things we can do for our own well-being,” Mirgain said. So, if no one in your support system is available to spend in-person time with you, perhaps you can attend a community or charity event, meeting new people while doing good deeds.
Adhere to Your Financial Limits
I often feel guilty for not being able to afford nicer gifts for my loved ones, but I’ve learned that transparency and boundaries can eliminate this burden. Simply setting a price limit for everyone’s gifts, or recommending a Secret Santa exchange to eliminate the number of gifts you buy, can alleviate this financial pressure.
And if you absolutely can’t partake in gift exchanges, there’s nothing wrong with letting your loved ones know. The right people will understand rather than judge you (and if they do judge, you can always throw some coal at their head.)
Additionally, rather than buying gifts, you can make customized items for the special people in your life. For example, as a writer, instead of sending holiday cards, I’ve written personalized, heartfelt poems for some of my close friends to let them know how much they’ve impacted my life. Sometimes, these types of gifts end up being even more meaningful than those you can purchase in a store.
Remember the True Meaning of the Holidays
At the end of the day—or season—the most important part of the holidays has nothing to do with materialistic items, but rather with the love we share with those around us. (I know, I know, another lame and cliche line—but it’s true.) Don’t let your stress cause you to lose sight of that.
“We have so many goals, so many targets,” Dr. Ellen Lee, a geriatric psychiatrist at UC San Diego Health, told AP News. “Getting all the gifts, decorating the house perfectly … I ask people, ‘What’s the best part of the holiday?’ It’s not usually about the decorations or all these extra things that we all spend a lot of time worrying about.”
Additionally, while it might feel like you’re the only one not in the holiday spirit, odds are, many others in your life are experiencing similar emotions—and it might help to open up to them.
“It’s important to recognize the common humanity that others, too, are struggling,” Mirgain added. “You’re not alone.”
At the very least, don’t force yourself to feel or be a certain way this year. It’s just a holiday; it will come and pass like it always does.
The post The Ultimate Holiday Survival Guide: Because I’m a Scrooge and Maybe You Are Too appeared first on VICE.
The post The Ultimate Holiday Survival Guide: Because I’m a Scrooge and Maybe You Are Too appeared first on VICE.
