On a night out in July 2017, Wilson Payamps was playing wingman for a friend who thought Cameron Hall Kirk was cute. Their friend groups happened to merge at a rave at the Brooklyn Mirage, an event venue in East Williamsburg, where they were all dancing together. Mr. Payamps approached Mr. Kirk on behalf of his female friend.
But Mr. Kirk threw a wrench in that plan by informing Mr. Payamps that he was gay. “Me too,” Mr. Payamps swiftly responded, surprising even himself with his assertiveness. “And I’m single.” He then bought Mr. Kirk a drink. An hour later, they went for a walk on the roof, and Mr. Payamps’s streak of boldness continued when he inquired about Mr. Kirk’s relationship status.
“I put all my cards on the table right away,” Mr. Payamps said. Before the conversation was over, Mr. Payamps leaned in for a kiss.
Mr. Kirk, who was 23 at the time and had just graduated from High Point University in North Carolina with a bachelor’s in business, struggled with dating. “I feel like going to school in the South, there weren’t many gay guys there,” he said.
But, after his night with Mr. Payamps, he said, “I remember going to work on Monday and being so excited that I felt like I could barely eat.”
They met up the next day at a “Game of Thrones” watch party with Mr. Payamps’s friends, and then again the following day at Variety Coffee Roasters in Greenpoint, where Mr. Kirk lived at the time.
They discussed their families and career goals. Mr. Payamps had moved to New York City from the Dominican Republic when he was 12. After coming out to his family, he moved, at age 19, from his father’s home in the Bronx to the Washington Heights neighborhood of Manhattan. He also shared his longtime dream of visiting Paris after seeing the Eiffel Tower on television as a young boy in Santiago.
Mr. Kirk, who grew up in Columbus, Ohio, and moved to New York in 2016, talked about being best friends with his siblings and calling his parents every day, a ritual that Mr. Payamps admired. They both wanted to take care of their families and were laser-focused on their careers.
Mr. Payamps, 36, is an account executive at Google. He graduated from the New York School of Interior Design with a bachelor’s in interior design.
Mr. Kirk, 30, is a partner at Hallmark Communities and HCC Construction, his family’s real estate development and construction businesses. Both companies are based in Columbus.
Three weeks after they met, Mr. Payamps invited Mr. Kirk over for a home-cooked meal at his studio on 181st and Riverside Drive, eager to bring him into his world in Washington Heights, or “Dominican land,” as he called it.
And, even though Mr. Kirk had caught him in the act of unpacking boxed food from a work event that he intended to pass off as the home-cooked meal, the sunset dinner overlooking the George Washington Bridge “was just perfection,” Mr. Payamps said.
To officially mark the start of their relationship three months after they met, Mr. Kirk helped make Mr. Payamps’s childhood dream come true and surprised him with a trip to Paris for his birthday.
They moved into an apartment in Williamsburg, Brooklyn, in January 2018, and gradually brought each other into their boisterous families. Navigating their cultural differences was a process, they said, but one that they’ve managed together.
Mr. Payamps spent his first Christmas with Mr. Kirk’s family in Columbus in 2018. Every year on Dec. 23, Mr. Kirk’s family members gather around a piano to sing Christmas carols together. Significant others, especially on the first visit, typically hide in the back, Mr. Kirk said. But Mr. Payamps was front and center.
When they wrapped up their carols, Mr. Payamps announced to the entire room that he had one more song he wanted to sing. He started belting out the lyrics to “Feliz Navidad.” (Now it’s tradition for the family to end with that song.)
“It was just hilarious seeing the white part of my family try to clap” — “out of beat,” Mr. Payamps interjected — “and everyone only knew one part: ‘I wanna wish you a Merry Christmas.’” Once that hook was done, Mr. Payamps was left singing alone in Spanish. It was a laughter-filled experience that helped them realize they had something special.
And then, for New Year’s, Mr. Kirk went to the Dominican Republic to visit Mr. Payamps’s family, most of whom do not speak English. Now, they go every year, and Mr. Kirk is learning Spanish. (“It’s coming along very slowly,” he said.)
Binge more Vows columns here and read all our wedding, relationship and divorce coverage here.
Now the couple is preparing to start a family of their own. In October 2022, they purchased a house in Bedford-Stuyvesant and hope to make it complete with children.
“In the gay culture, you rarely get to see couples that flourish and grow together and have kids and do all those things,” Mr. Payamps said. “So for me, I didn’t know how it was going to happen, but I always knew that I wanted to do that.” With Mr. Kirk, Mr. Payamps knew it could be possible.
In August 2020, Mr. Kirk proposed in Palm Springs, Calif., and a year later, Mr. Payamps proposed at Canoe Studios in Chelsea.
The two both worked in the fashion industry for years — Mr. Kirk in marketing at Saks Fifth Avenue and Mr. Payamps as a fashion stylist — and bonded over their love for fashion. So, it was only fitting that their wedding became a fashion opportunity.
Their suits were custom-designed by Raul Lopez of Luar. Mr. Lopez and Mr. Payamps have been close friends since they first met 15 years ago in the Washington Heights queer nightlife scene.
The couple worked with Mr. Lopez and his two head designers to execute their visions — while Mr. Kirk’s black suit featured beaded fringe that made it look “Dune-esque,” he said in reference to the film, Mr. Payamps described his suit as a bit “funkier.”
On Sept. 14, the couple celebrated their wedding day by touring some of their favorite spots in New York.
They were married at a terrace suite at Casa Cipriani in Downtown Manhattan before 20 guests. William Kirk, Mr. Kirk’s brother who had received a one-day New York State marriage officiant license, led the ceremony.
As Mr. Payamps made his entrance, Mr. Kirk sang “Turning Page” by Sleeping at Last as a surprise. “I broke down when I heard it,” Mr. Payamps said. Mr. Kirk also read his vows twice, once in English and once in Spanish.
The couple and their guests then hopped into Uber cars to their next stop, the Grill. There they enjoyed a four-course meal that included caviar, crab cake, peppered filet mignon and berry tart.
Then, they danced to reggaeton tracks played by D.J. Joselo at the Mulberry bar with 65 friends until 2 a.m.
“We had gotten good advice to try and soak up every moment, so we really did,” Mr. Kirk said. “But there were so many micro moments that just made the day feel really long in a great way.”
That included debriefing at their terrace suite at Casa Cipriani at the night’s end with their families and Mr. Lopez. The group, all clad in hotel robes, ordered room service and caught up on the funny moments that happened throughout the day, including one aunt who was having so much fun that she fell into a large potted plant.
“And hopefully, soon, our own crazy little boys will be running around, bringing even more joy to our lives,” Mr. Kirk said.
On This Day
When Sept. 14, 2024
Where Casa Cipriani, New York
Libra and Capricorn Alexis Kirk, Mr. Kirk’s sister, created a wedding suite with caviar spoons, napkins and menus bearing a wedding logo of their two astrological signs intertwined — Mr. Kirk is a Capricorn and Mr. Payamps is a Libra — created by the design team at Luar. Joe’s Pizza was served at midnight in pizza boxes customized with a drawing of the couple’s home.
Drag Show “It wouldn’t be a gay celebration without a drag show,” Mr. Payamps said. Beaujangless, a drag queen and friend of the couple, performed at the Mulberry. It was the first time that both their parents had seen a drag show. Mr. Kirk noticed that throughout the performance, his father’s jaw was dropped.
‘Dress Your Best’ “We know we have fashionable friends,” Mr. Payamps said, so the dress code was “dress your best.” A few friends asked if they could wear white, to which the couple said, “absolutely.”
The post From Wingman to Main Man appeared first on New York Times.