Jay Pharoah has replaced his cross necklace a few times over the years. The cross his mother bought him warped after daily wear and tear; diamonds popped out of the one he bought himself from New York City’s diamond district.
He now has a diamond encrusted cross on a white gold chain that viewers might spot around his neck in “Jared,” his recently released comedy special on YouTube. But to Mr. Pharoah, a former “Saturday Night Live” cast member, the bling isn’t the point.
“It’s really about what it symbolizes, and the cementing of it, and how it keeps me grounded,” he said.
Mr. Pharoah reflected on what his cross symbolizes and how he hopes to carry himself on and off the stage. This interview has been edited and condensed.
Talk to me about your cross.
It’s a diamond cross, with — is it white gold? Yeah, I believe it’s definitely white gold. Now, to tell you the carats, I don’t get caught up on any of that, so I couldn’t tell you. But if it was just a regular silver cross, I wouldn’t care. It’s about what it represents. It’s not about how it looks to me. God knows I do curse and whatever. Sometimes I say things, and I am getting better now. As a comedian, you just let them fly, but you also have to be cognizant that when you do have that cross on, you’re representing what it is. So if I want to be the best representation, then I have to act like this symbol that I’m carrying. So it’s not just a piece to me, it’s a way of life.
So this piece is very much about your connection to your religion.
Absolutely. Christianity. It’s not a fad or a phase; it’s a way of life. It’s waking up every day and choosing to walk in the right path and not derail yourself. Now, you will get derailed, because that’s just how it goes, but at the end of the day, if you’re trying earnestly to do the right thing, God will carry you through everything.
I imagine it’s fairly heavy, and you must be constantly aware of it around your neck. What does that do for you — feeling the weight of it every time you wear it?
I grab it when I’m nervous and I pray for the anxiety to leave. It’s so funny, and I’m not exaggerating when I say this. If I’m not living correctly — say I mess up — and I’m just going around my day: If I’ve taken it off and I go to put it on, it will be backwards. It won’t be forward. It never fails. Sometimes it’s eerie to me.
This cross is everything. And then when I do take it off, when I take it off at night, sometimes I feel like the protection has been minimized. But at the same time, it can’t be minimized because it lives inside of you.
Does the cross help you to stay grounded while you’re performing?
Being onstage is an extension of yourself, but it’s like a W.W.E. character. You’re playing up certain parts. [The comedian] Katt Williams onstage and Katt Williams offstage, OK, the intellect is there, but the level is different. He’s not doing all of the accentuated character voice. He’s not doing all that offstage. He’s speaking regularly to you. When we get onstage, we are these characters of ourselves.
Even though I am striving to be the holy man, there’s still weaknesses that, in the special, I talked about. And certain things I’m trying to be better at in life.
What does it feel like, wearing the cross while performing?
Protection. I feel like it encompasses protection. I don’t have to worry about my performance up there. Now, if you watch the special, there’s a bit up there that happens where I talk about where I got called the N-word. And it did take God himself to hold me back from strangling the dude. Now he got pushed. He got pushed, but that was probably God even holding back my energy. So it wasn’t a superbad situation where it could have escalated to a certain point, and it didn’t. Even in that, the height of that, there was protection there.
Do you think you’ll ever pass this cross down?
I would give it to my nephew, but I’m going to give him his own cross anyway. He does admire my cross, and I don’t got any kids right now, but I mean if I did, I guess I could give it to one of them as well, just for protection purposes. But what I probably will teach them is that a jewel isn’t going to protect you. It’s how you’re living your life and it’s how you walk down the street. The piece is just showing somebody that I’m about that.
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