It’s important to make a good first impression, but we usually think of that as a handshake and a hello. Sometimes, your name gets there first. And if you’ve got one of those names people instinctively recoil from, you may be starting at a deficit.
According to a recent survey conducted by Talker Research and reported by StudyFinds, some names carry overwhelmingly negative associations, and if yours happens to be one of them, well… condolences to all the Chads, Donalds, Johns, Damiens, and especially the Karens out there.
The survey of 2,000 Americans found that nearly one in five people admit they judge someone based solely on their first name. Karen really has it rough, and it’s no surprise why. The name became forever associated with a particular kind of upper-middle-class entitlement since it became a derogatory term back in 2020. Ever since then, it’s been hurled at people who are not literally named Karen but are spiritual Karens, the type of middle-aged women with bob haircuts, possibly with some ugly dyed streaks of blonde, who carry a distinct, intense “I’d like to speak to your manager” vibe.
The Most Hated Names, Next to Karen
Chad came in second, thanks to years of online culture turning it into a caricature of preposterous masculinity. Damien is an odd one, as its stigma seems to still be lingering around since 1976’s The Omen, the Richard Donner-directed horror movie about a kid named Damien who turned out to be the Antichrist. It’s a good movie, but it’s incredible how it’s ruined a name for 50 years and shows no signs of letting up. That’s staying power beaten only by Adolph.
Donald…well, we all know why Donald is on the list. To be more specific, based on current polling, 59 percent of us know why, while 36 percent of us don’t understand why Donald is despised, and a truly befuddling four percent have no idea what to think about Donald at all. I’m talking about the name, of course. I’m in no way referencing any specific Donalds out there, and I’m especially not talking about any Donald who likes to put their hated names on everything.
The most perplexing name on the list is John. According to the Social Security Administration, John is the third most popular boy’s name, and the third most popular name overall for US babies born between 1926 and 2025, with over 4.2 million Johns having been born in the US during that stretch, being beaten out only by Michael and James. The survey didn’t reveal why John made the list, but StudyFinds speculates it probably has something to do with “its sheer ubiquity.” I get that. I like Timothée Chalamet, but if I see his obnoxious World Cup Adidas commercial one more time, I think I might call for a Jihad on Chalamet.
Gen Z Is Judging Your Name the Hardest
Outside of the blind hatred of certain names, the study also found that younger Americans were quicker to make snap judgments, like, for example, ones based solely on a person’s first name. Twenty-nine percent of Gen Z respondents admitted they form assumptions based on a person’s name alone, compared with 21 percent of millennials.
Forty-two percent of respondents said they don’t really identify with their own first name, and one in five said they’d change it if they could — which they can, by the way. It’s not even that expensive or difficult. Stop whining and do it already, you cowards.
When asked what they could replace their name with, a lot of them went with classics like Lisa and Natalie. Others said they would go with names like Furnace, Indigo, Legacy, and Sapling, because either all the people surveyed were living on a hippie commune or absolutely nobody involved took the survey seriously, which means I’m sorry for having wasted your time. I really wish I had read that before I wrote all this.
The post A New Survey Revealed America’s Most Hated First Names appeared first on VICE.
