
Get better at: Giving hard feedback
Today’s move
Ditch the compliment sandwich and try this three-step framework for providing feedback.
First, offer praise for something they’re doing well.
Next, be direct about the issue you want to address.
Then, provide a specific suggestion for how to improve.
Why it works
Etiquette experts Daniel Post Senning and Lizzie Post said that the classic compliment sandwich isn’t necessarily the most effective way to give feedback.
However, if you end the conversation by offering a specific suggestion, rather than a compliment, you’re helping them understand how to improve and and feedback becomes constructive.
A 2022 study published by the American Psychological Association found that people do value honest feedback. The study comprised five feedback experiments with nearly 2,000 participants. In all five experiments, the people providing feedback consistently underestimated how much others wanted it.
Try it today
Take five minutes before you leave work to write down feedback you’ve been avoiding addressing with someone. Use the three-step framework to plan out what you’re going to say.
Make sure you end with a specific suggestion they can apply to improve.
The bottom line
People appreciate honest feedback, and want to get better, but they need guidance, not just criticism.
Source
This advice comes from Business Insider’s 2025 interview with etiquette experts Daniel Post Senning and Lizzie Post, who shared a three-step approach to giving constructive criticism. You can read the full story here.
This story also includes information from a study published by the American Psychological Association, which shows that people underestimate others’ desire for feedback. You can read more about that study here.
Read the original article on Business Insider
The post Get better at work today: 3 things to say when you need to give tough feedback appeared first on Business Insider.




