Apparently, there’s a new college dating trend going around, but it isn’t actually all that new in theory. Coined by Natalia Castillo, editor-in-chief of University of Pennsylvania’s student magazine in 2024, the trend is titled “SABS,” or “See And Be Seen”—and it’s exactly how it sounds.
What Is SABSing?
SABSing involves something many of us avoid: being seen. This means appearing approachable while walking through crowded areas, sitting on the campus lawn amidst other students, and lingering long enough for someone to notice you.
However, you must be tactful about it, as you’re not attempting to be seen by just about anybody, like your toxic ex or that clingy dating app match you’ve been avoiding. Rather, it’s about nonchalantly catching the attention of the person you’re crushing on or other potential dates.
“SABSing is an art—you duck for cover when you see that ex you swore you never wanted to see again, but you eagerly try to make eye contact with your class crush,” Castillo explained in the student magazine.
“SABSing takes you back to the basics, before algorithms, to spontaneously meeting people ‘in the wild,’ says Chloë Bean, LMFT, Somatic Trauma Therapist. “The name developed on campus, but it’s rooted in a traditional practice from European cultures.”
How to Engage in SABSing
To me, it sounds like SABSing is an attempt to attract a meet-cute straight out of a rom-com. I mean, it’s true you likely won’t find your soulmate from the comfort of your couch—unelss, of course, you have more luck with dating apps than I ever did.
“There’s something fun about when you see somebody else SABSing, you know they want to be out in the world and they want to see you, too. So I feel comfortable going up to someone when they’re splayed out on the grass,” Grace Belgrader, a senior at Brown University, told Town & Country. “You’ll catch me on the Main Green with an essay due in a few hours, trying to see my laptop in the blinding sun, because sometimes I can’t bear to leave all the people.”
SABSing is as simple as going out in public and presenting yourself as open and approachable. For example, when I first moved to my new town as a newly single 20-something, I used to write or read at the local cafe, smiling when someone new came in and striking up convos with the barista. Typically, I would’ve kept my head down and secured my noise-canceling headphones over my ears, but I was on a mission to make friends—and it worked.
Why Is SABSing the Latest and Greatest Dating Trend?
Because dating apps are dreadful at this point. That’s why.
And, of course, people are craving actual connection today. Naturally, getting outside of your home and around others will increase your odds of meeting “the one.” If you want to bump into prospective suitors the old-fashioned way, you must be willing to put yourself out there and let yourself be seen.
“There’s a freedom to this dating tactic that takes away the pressure to schedule something in order to connect with someone, hoping it works out,” adds Bean. “SABSing gets you out of your head and into the world so you can literally see and hear what’s going on and be seen in that environment. When we are on the dating apps, we can spend a lot of time analyzing, hoping, and becoming who this person might want you to be. The SABSing trend is almost like going to a dance or party during the day, and you’re just seeing who’s there, no pressure needed!”
Of all the possible dating trends out there, I’d say this one is pretty wholesome. It’s not hurting anyone, and if anything, it’s encouraging young adults to be more social and open-minded. Rather than keeping their eyes glued to their phones, they’re seeking in-person interactions and connections. I’d call that a win.
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