To the Editor:
Re “One Can Get This Beautiful Only With Time,” by Roger Rosenblatt (Opinion guest essay, April 19):
Thank you to Mr. Rosenblatt for seeing the beauty in old ladies. At a certain age, women can feel physically invisible at the same time we are our most valuable and productive selves.
“Fierce hope,” as Mr. Rosenblatt puts it, is one characteristic of beautiful old ladies. But we old ladies also possess the calm wisdom that lets us mourn and accept our losses, and at the same time marvel at the wonder that we have created so much love in our lives.
Jill Zimmerman Rutledge Longmont, Colo. The writer is a psychotherapist who counsels women 18 and older.
To the Editor:
I’m an old lady. I’m also an academic who studies aging. I find something problematic in this essay in praise of old women.
For Roger Rosenblatt, being beautiful while old involves an imitation of youth. Mr. Rosenblatt doesn’t fail to mention that his wife, Ginny — and I don’t doubt that she is lovely — has lustrous hair and smooth skin.
Same beauty standards as ever, unintentionally betrayed.
Judy Z. Segal Vancouver, British Columbia
To the Editor:
In his paean to old ladies, Roger Rosenblatt asks: “What is the secret here? What do old ladies have that sets them apart?” His answer that it’s “fierce hope” misses the reality that women who are now in our 80s and 90s (I am 95) are survivors.
More than men, we women born in the 1930s and ’40s have had to recreate ourselves in an evolving world that has changed our lives no matter what our circumstances.
Few of my 1952 college classmates went on to graduate school, while many left after two years to marry and follow their husbands wherever their careers took them. Some of us with four-year degrees became secretaries to men no older or better educated than we.
When Roger and I were colleagues at Time magazine decades ago, women, with rare exceptions, were still treated as the handmaidens to writers that the co-founder Henry Luce expected us to be.
Everyone who has lived for eight or nine decades has experienced change and loss, but for today’s old ladies those years have required unusual flexibility, innovation and ingenuity, qualities that serve us well in old age.
Anne Hopkins Orient, N.Y.
To the Editor:
I turned 74 on April 16 and was feeling a bit down, but reading this essay put it all into perspective again. It truly was a birthday gift to me.
Luckily, I am an old lady who is in perfect health, is still engaged in a small business that makes me financially secure and has two wonderful daughters, twin grandsons and a granddaughter on the way.
People forget that even though we are older, inside we feel the way we did as a teenager — except wiser. Thank you for confirming what we women know: that older women still have great worth and hopefully for years to come.
Carmel Muelhausen Chicago
The Pianist András Schiff Shows a Way to Protest
To the Editor:
Re “Pianist Welcomes a Change in Hungary” (Arts, April 22):
Despite their opposition to the assault on democracy that is our current federal government, many people bemoan their inability to effect change. “I’m not in a position of power,” they say. “What can I do?”
The pianist András Schiff has an answer. He refuses to play concerts in countries whose leaders he opposes, including the United States. This has meant canceling concerts at venues such as Carnegie Hall. Only now, after the ouster of Prime Minister Viktor Orban, will Mr. Schiff return to his native Hungary.
Mr. Schiff should be an inspiration to everyone. We can all do something. If an activity or investment involves a country with a fascist regime or a group that supports such a regime, athletes can sit out the Olympics, companies can refuse to do business, and individuals can forgo travel. We can all leave those imported items on the shelf.
It may mean loss — of opportunity, money or convenience — but it is a crucial way for every human being to participate in change.
András Schiff is not only one of the greatest living pianists; he is also a hero for our time. Bravo.
Deborah L. Cabaniss New York The writer is a psychiatrist and psychoanalyst.
The post Four Old Women Share Their Wisdom appeared first on New York Times.
