Donald Trump wants to crush The Swamp. The leaks, the sneaks, and the secrets are all there. Our writers, David Gardner, Farrah Tomazin, and Sarah Ewall-Wice, are sifting through the ooze so you don’t have to. Don’t miss out.
In this week’s News from the Ooze: Abigail Jackson, Jamie Dimon, Ruben Gallego, Kash Patel, James Comey, Steven Cheung, Constantine Tassoulas, Sean Parnell, Cardinal Gerhard Ludwig Müller, Devin Nunes, Joe Biden, Karoline Leavitt, Bettina Johnson, Rick Springfield, Jack and Tanya Posobiec, Jennifer Nason, Robert Thompson, Kingsley Wilson, and a must-read update on a Greek epic.
Trump Spinners’ Wild Insults to Journalists
When HuffPost’s SV Dáte went public by showing Karoline Leavitt replying to a request for comment with the playground taunt, “Your mom,” it created a viral sensation. But to those who cover the White House day in and day out, there was something of a shrug. “That’s just how they are,” was the sentiment. Forgive The Swamp for saying that this should not be shrugged off. In fact, “your mom” was not even, by the standards of Leavitt and her colleagues, particularly combative or vituperative. Don’t take our word for it, however. Instead, look at a few weeks in the lives of reporters at the Daily Beast, and compare their courteous and calm requests for comment with the replies they received. Here is Steven Cheung, happily using the F-word, Pete Hegseth’s chief spinner, Sean Parnell, calling a woman a “moron,” the White House’s Abigail Jackson recycling a meme and the Pentagon’s Kingsley Wilson calling a former war correspondent a “crackhead.” The Swamp doubts there will be much shame elicited among those who proffered this supercut of contumely. But we would ask one question of the Trump aides replying in such terms to reporters: Is that how you would speak to your mom?
Sep. 4: Meme What You Say
Sep. 22: “Low-IQ Losers”
Aug. 14: “No-one Reads You”
Sep. 16: Cheung’s F-Word Rant
Oct. 20: Pentagon Chief to Woman: “Moron.”
Oct. 7: “Get a Job”
Oct. 3: “S***posters”
Oct. 22: “Your Brains Are Rotted.”
Sep. 11: “You’re Mentally Ill”
Oct. 16: Ex-War Correspondent Is “Crackhead”
Sep. 19: Meme Recycling
This Manosphere’s a Bit Empty
Washington made its latest attempt to diagnose the modern male malaise on Monday, when a few dozen policy wonks and former frat boys gathered at the National Press Club for the National Symposium on Young Men. The daylong conference was devoted to what organizers called the “mental, digital, and spiritual crisis” facing American males. As the government shutdown hit its 34th day, Senators John Cornyn and Ruben Gallego crossed the aisle to jointly take time out of their not-so-demanding schedules to address the half-empty room, joining a bipartisan roster of academics, pollsters, and think tank fellows determined to figure out why today’s 20-somethings would rather watch YouTube than show up for civic duty. Or indeed for symposia like these. The agenda read like a fever dream of Beltway paternalism: Oklahoma GOP Senator James Lankford and Patrick Kelly from the Knights of Columbus Catholic fraternity discussed “the role of faith and civic Institutions in restoring male community”; John Cusey from the Institute for Families and Technology joined a “digital storm” panel chat on how to stop young men from gaming too much; and academics Larry Stimpert and Edward Magee issued a late-afternoon plea from college presidents on how to make campuses “safe for masculinity.” By the end of the day, the chairs were mostly empty, but the question lingered: Do the young men of America even want to be saved?
It’s a Dog’s Life for DC’s Pampered Pooches
While struggling federal workers are looking to unload their homes in DC, the higher end (Trumpy) buyers are still splashing out on the bigger properties. At 53,000 feet, one mega mansion being built in McLean is said to be the biggest ever constructed in the region. There will be parking for at least 25 cars, 10 bedrooms, 5 kitchens, a wine cellar and a wine room, 2 elevators and, of course, a ballroom. And just in case Fido is feeling left out, he or she gets a bedroom. With a shower.
The Duke of Delusion Takes Flight
Once upon a time in MAGAland, Kash Patel wrote a children’s book called The Plot Against the King — a pro-Trump tale where “Hillary Queenton” and the “Duke of Deception” battle “King Donald” who is guided by the one man brave enough to uncover the truth: Kash himself. The book was published in 2022 as the first part of a trilogy, and makes it clear that the FBI Director views himself as a hero. In the storyline, Patel is “Kash the Distinguished Discoverer”: a wizard “known far and wide as the one person who could discover anything about anything.” He learns that a “shifty knight” (Democrat Adam Schiff) claims to have evidence that King Donald cheated his way into office with the help of “Russionia.” He exposes “Keeper Komey” (then head of the FBI James Comey) for the baseless rumors being spread about the King. And he destroys dragons and trolls and saves princesses, occasionally accompanied by “Duke Devin” (Devin Nunes, chief executive of Trump’s Truth Social platform).
Arguably, all the story lacks is a taxpayer-funded chariot service for wizard Kash to fly across the country to rendezvous with his 27-year-old country-singer girlfriend, Alexis Wilkins. Perhaps the only “plot against the king” worth worrying about is the one where an entitled protagonist mistakes the FBI for his personal fiefdom.
Spotted: J.P. Morgan’s Jamie Dimon and Jennifer Nason at Cipriani Wall Street for the American Australian Association Benefit Dinner, alongside News Corp chief executive Robert Thomson and Aussie rocker Rick Springfield (who wowed the crowd with his 80s classic Jesse’s Girl). Joe Biden looking frail but happy dining at Carbonara in Arlington. Former deputy Treasury secretary Michael Faulkender not dressed up at a private Halloween party in D.C.’s Shaw neighborhood. Right-wing activist Jack Posobiec and second wife Tanya Posobiec, Fox News’ Raymond Arroyo and Dutch far right political commentator Eva Vlaardingerbroek schmoozing with Germany’s Cardinal Gerhard Ludwig Müller—a sworn enemy of the late Pope Francis—at MAGA hangout Butterworth’s.
KG’s POTUS-Eater-Beating Odyssey
Kimberly Guilfoyle’s Odyssesian journey from Palm Beach to Athens is finally over. She defied the POTUS-eaters, MAGA Medusas, and all manner of wardrobe challenges to offer her credentials to Greek President Constantine Tassoulas on Tuesday. It may have taken Trump nearly 10 months to pry Kimberly out of PB but at least Donald Trump Jr. can bring girlfriend Bettina Johnson to an event without spotting his ex lurking in the spotlight. As for Madam Ambassador, she’d be wise to recall Odysseus’s words that “Nothing is sweeter than one’s own country… it’s better than living in a wealthy house in a foreign land.”
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