Welcome to Late Night Roundup, a rundown of the previous night’s highlights that lets you sleep — and lets us get paid to watch comedy. Here are the 50 best movies on Netflix right now.
Threats and Posts
Jimmy Kimmel thanked his audience for sticking with him on Wednesday, giving a shout-out to viewers whose affiliates were still refusing to air his show, as well as friends who “are never watching the show at any other time.”
“I did hear from one very special friend,” he said.
“Moments after we taped our show last night, the Mad Red Hatter wrote, ‘I can’t believe ABC Fake News gave Jimmy Kimmel his job back.’ You can’t believe they gave me my job back? I can’t believe we gave you your job back.” — JIMMY KIMMEL
“He says, ‘I think we’re going to test ABC out on this. Let’s see how we do. Last time I went after them, they gave me $16 Million Dollars. This one sounds even more lucrative. A true bunch of losers.’ Only Donald Trump would try to prove he wasn’t threatening ABC by threatening ABC.” — JIMMY KIMMEL
“This was his big closer: ‘Let Jimmy Kimmel rot in his bad ratings.’ And he does know bad ratings — he has some of the worst ratings any president has ever had. So, on behalf of all of us, welcome to the crappy ratings club, Mr. President.” — JIMMY KIMMEL
The Punchiest Punchlines (That Escalated Quickly Edition)
“But, hey, this is a pretty standard inconvenience. I’m sure we will never hear about it again — unless, of course, there is an entire right-wing media apparatus built on grievance and hyperbole that wants to breathlessly recount it as a harrowing brush with danger.” — JORDAN KLEPPER, on a U.N. escalator malfunction that affected the president and first lady
“Are we going all in on the president being a victim of escalator sabotage? Because the deep state wants him to get his steps in?” — JORDAN KLEPPER
“So, just to recap, Trump will not release the Epstein files, but we will be doing a thorough investigation into who stopped his escalator.” — JIMMY KIMMEL
“The White House is now looking into who would have a grudge against Trump, and so far they’ve narrowed it down to 189 countries.” — JIMMY FALLON
“I mean, the whole thing was a headache for Trump. But even worse, he couldn’t take any Tylenol.” — JIMMY FALLON
The Bits Worth Watching
Jimmy Fallon popped in on Kim Kardashian for Wednesday’s “Tonight Show” cold open.
What We’re Excited About on Thursday Night
Regina Hall, who stars in the new film “One Battle After Another,” will appear on Thursday’s “Daily Show.”
Also, Check This Out
The pioneering bass player Carol Kaye plans to reject her induction into this year’s Rock & Roll Hall of Fame and boycott the induction ceremony in November.
The post Kimmel Says There’s Plenty of Room in the ‘Bad Ratings’ Club appeared first on New York Times.
