I wasn’t prepared for the world of youth sports. It’s expensive, competitive, and a huge commitment.

When I was growing up, my involvement with sports was limited to playing dodgeball in PE. When my 10-year-old son became interested in soccer, I assumed he would be content with an after-school soccer skills class and playing pick-up games with other kids on the playground.

However, my son quickly developed a passion for the sport that bordered on obsession. That’s when I was introduced to the wild world of youth sports. I was not prepared for the intensity, cost, or time commitment involved in order for young kids to play a game they love.

I was shocked by the intensity

After my son’s begging became hard to ignore, I told him that he could try out for a travel soccer team. My first surprise came when I realized that he would need to go through a few rounds of try-outs to see if he would make the cut. Even in elementary school, I learned, there might not be a place for every kid who wants to play.

Fortunately, my son made the team, and he was elated. But the surprises kept coming.

I wasn’t prepared for the cut-throat nature of youth sports

In order for my son to participate in soccer tournaments, I needed to submit a copy of his birth certificate. I didn’t understand why I needed to prove my child was 10. However, another parent explained that due to the cut-throat nature of youth sports, some parents lie about their child’s age to either allow them to play with older, more advanced players. Alternatively, some parents lie because they want their child to be the oldest player on a team, which helps them stand out as a star player.

Some parents also enroll their kids in multiple soccer teams for more practice time to give their children an advantage. Others send their kids to soccer camp over the summer to gain skills while their teammates are at the beach.

I found the cost jaw-dropping

When I accepted my son’s spot on the team, I was hit with a $3,000 bill. The league warned that the cost was not refundable under any circumstances, including injuries.

In addition, I was required to buy three separate personalized uniforms, which cost over $200 altogether. I took my son to a shop to try on a sample because I wanted to ensure I got him the correct size. However, barely two weeks into the season, my son had a growth spurt, and all three shirts looked too small for the rest of the season.

I had to commit to a team without knowing anything about the schedule

Before paying, I asked when and where my son’s team would practice. I also inquired about where his games would be. In response, I found out that the schedule isn’t finalized until close to the start of the season. That meant I had to commit to taking my son somewhere three or four times a week without knowing what I was getting myself into.

I asked other soccer parents if this was normal. I had a hard time believing that any parents, let alone working parents with multiple children like me, could commit to an unknown schedule. I quickly learned that, although most parents don’t like this system, it was something I needed to get used to if I wanted my son to play.

One parent told me that they didn’t care and would disrupt their entire family’s life for soccer practice if that’s what they needed to do to make it happen. Perhaps some of the kids in my son’s league will go pro, but having to commit to being available nearly anytime, anywhere didn’t sit well with me.

Getting my son to soccer is inconvenient and time-consuming

A couple of weeks before the season started, I discovered that my son, who usually gets in bed by 7:30 each night, would be attending practices that don’t end until 8:30 — and most practices run even later. It’s hard for my son to wake up for school the day after practice, and I worry I am sacrificing his academics for sports. Moreover, where practices are held changes frequently, making it hard to plan.

In addition to weekday practices, my son has at least one game per weekend, sometimes two. Because many games are far from home, they often take up half a day and make it impossible to do anything else.

I’m not sure I would have agreed to let my son try out for a soccer team if I had known more about youth sports from the outset. However, he loves playing and being with others who share his passion for the sport. I see him blossoming, and there is no backing out now.

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