A mom has sparked a viral debate after her toddler was seen “coaching” himself back to sleep in the middle of the night.
Jasmine Clark (@hellomina333), mom to 2-year-old Teddy, shared footage from her baby monitor in a reel on Instagram, showing the toddler sitting up in his crib and crying.
Then, in a surprising twist, Teddy claps his hands, says “high five,” gives himself a high five, and cheers, “yay, good job everybody!” Moments later, he lies back down.
“Teddy sometimes wakes suddenly from sleep crying, but pretty quickly stops when he takes a second to realize where he is,” Clark told Newsweek. “This night I was watching the monitor because I heard him wake up, and I saw him doing this all by himself.”
Clark explained that Teddy’s self-coaching language wasn’t something she had taught him intentionally.
Instead, it echoed the phrases she and her husband, Nick, often use. “These are all things I say throughout the day… when I’m encouraging him—and sometimes myself and my husband too,” she said.
When Teddy was younger, Clark said her instinct was always to scoop him up immediately. “That made the two of us have some pretty crummy sleep,” she added.
Over time, she trained herself to pause before intervening. “I started just by counting to a hundred before I would go get him, and a lot of time that was plenty of time for him to quiet down. Now, I can tell the difference between crying because he needs me and crying because he’s settling himself,” she said.
Clark was clear that she doesn’t fully embrace the “cry it out” method, which involves allowing a baby to cry for set periods without immediate comfort in order to encourage self-soothing and independent sleep.
“I don’t love the idea,” she said. “We contact-napped until 10 months, and he moved into his own room at a year [old]. I personally read about the different methods and just pushed myself to let him try to settle for five to 15 minutes at a time. After that if he was upset, I would hold him for nap or rock him to sleep. He got the hang of it and has been an extremely independent sleeper ever since.”
Clark’s reel has clocked up 1.5 million views and hundreds of comments.
Many were in awe at how the toddler managed to coach himself back to sleep with no interaction with his parents.
“Self soothing, pep talk, confirming he’s constantly hearing encouraging phrases. Yes MOMMY & DADDY… great job!!” one user wrote.
“A parent knows when their child needs them and this little guy is being monitored BUT so handled his wake up (which we all do) perfectly—self soothed and encouraged!” a developmental specialist in early childhood education agreed.
However, other parents commented that it made them “sad to watch” Teddy crying in his crib, and also criticized Clark for letting her toddler have a blanket in his bed.
Lauri Leadley, a clinical sleep educator and founder and president at Valley Sleep Center, told Newsweek it is possible for a toddler to coach themselves back to sleep.
“There are a few ways to teach a toddler to self-soothe, such as focusing on taking breaths,” she said. “Toddlers like to look at books, which can be encouraged early on in preparing for bedtime or alone in their room. These are great early years sleep hygiene practices that become habits as they grow.”
Clark said that most people thought it was cute or inspiring, “but there’s a fraction of people who say I am abusive by leaving my baby to cry. This whole scenario lasted less than two minutes before he was fully asleep again.”
Despite some criticism, the mom is focused on the joy of the moment—and the independence her son has gained. “He won’t even sleep in my bed when he’s sick or restless. I’ve tried!” she said.
The post Mom Sparks Viral Debate Over Son ‘Coaching’ Himself Back To Sleep appeared first on Newsweek.
