We tried building our dream life in Portugal. After 3 years, we realized living abroad was actually holding us back.

For years, living abroad felt like a dream.

In my mid-20s, I’d left my home in Canada in 2012 with an EU passport in hand. I moved to Brussels, where I built a marketing career and earned a Ph.D.

During a stint living in Rio, I even met my now-husband. Together, around 2020, we landed in Portugal, which we’d thought would be our forever home.

It seemed like a great fit as we both spoke fluent Portuguese and wanted to stay in Europe. Plus, Lisbon had direct flights to both Toronto (where I’m from) and Rio (where he’s from).

By this point, I was planning to start my own swimwear business, and Portugal, once again, felt like an excellent choice — it gets lots of sun and is renowned for its textile industry.

For the next few years, we navigated hurdles and put down roots. I launched my business (Now in Rio Swim), and we bought a fixer-upper in a village outside Lisbon.

But by our third year in Portugal, building a family and securing my future were on my mind. I realized I couldn’t write the next chapter of my life how I wanted while living abroad.

And, much to my surprise, I had begun to miss home.

Many things felt difficult or impossible for me to accomplish in Portugal — especially as a freelancer without citizenship

The more rooted I tried to become in Portugal, the more I felt like I was being pushed away.

Despite speaking the local language, I often felt like I was fighting a battle just to accomplish essential bureaucratic tasks. Simply opening a bank account took me several trips and hours of collecting documents.

As a freelancer not hired by a Portuguese company, I ran into many issues when needing to provide my proof of income and employment.

Without a fixed contract from a local company, I was often not considered a reliable applicant for many loans. Plus, many situations were made more difficult by the fact that I had a residency permit, not a citizenship.

Applying for a mortgage was complicated, and I was unable to get financing to buy a car, get credit cards, or take out business loans.

In Portugal, we were able to get one credit card, which was in my husband’s name, with a limit of €1,000 — all the bank would give us.

We made it work for a while, but it really became an issue once we needed help starting a family through IVF, a process that would cost us thousands. We couldn’t take out loans to cover the cost, and it was too much to put on that credit card.

By this point, I was 36 years old and we’d been in Portugal for three years. As much as I’d loved living abroad for the past decade, we truly felt we couldn’t build the future we wanted in Portugal.

Much to my surprise, I was also missing my home, family, and community in Canada. So, I convinced my Brazilian husband to move north with me.

In many ways, moving back to Canada felt like a breath of fresh air

Living in Canada again, I felt like a weight had been lifted from my shoulders. So many things felt more accessible than they were before.

Tasks I struggled to accomplish in Portugal were flying off my to-do list. I bought a car, and I was able to secure a business loan to relaunch my company.

Part of this ease is probably because I’m Canadian, but my Brazilian husband has also felt this shift.

He secured his permanent residency within six months of arriving and got his driver’s license. Plus, he’s working and taking government-funded English classes. When he first arrived, he was able to get a credit card with a limit of several thousand dollars, and I got a lower-rate credit card with a sizable limit, too.

Within the first year, we were able to go through the IVF process, and fall pregnant with our first child. I spent thousands on medications in a span of seven days — and we were able to use our higher limits on Canadian credit cards to make this happen (though we still made sure to pay them off quickly).

Canada’s not perfect, and I miss Portugal and all of its beauty. But then I wonder if I could ever live abroad again after experiencing how easy everything feels here.

Yes, there are obstacles to overcome — but I look forward to having a family here and growing my business. For years, we thought Europe was our forever home. But this, right here, feels like the start of something better.

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