Immaturity in dating is a major red flag for most of us, as it often indicates issues like a lack of emotional intelligence or an unreadiness for commitment. However, it can sometimes be tough to spot immaturity at first glance.
One Redditor proposed the question: “What screams ‘I’m too immature to date someone?’” Here’s what people had to say.
1. “Inability or unwillingness to look at [a] problem or issue through your partner’s perspective.” — u/AmigoDelDiabla
Someone who only focuses on their own feelings and perspectives usually has some growing to do. This selfishness is often a symptom of immaturity and a lack of consideration for others—two traits you don’t want in a partner.
2. “Deliberately trying to make the significant other jealous.” — anonymous
Unfortunately, this is a common, validation-seeking habit today. It’s also a tell-tale sign of immaturity.
3. “Making the other person responsible for yourself, whether it’s about your mental or physical health, feeding habits, cleanliness, or anything else.” — u/mindeatingjellyfish
Many people who get into relationships believe their partner should take care of them in every sense of the word. While it’s natural to crave support and tenderness from your partner (especially during tough times), neither person should feel solely responsible for the other’s well-being.
4. “Having a list of qualities the other person should have but not once [thinking] about how to better themselves or what they can bring to the relationship.” — u/KDenim06
Many daters set high standards for their prospective partners—as they should. However, if they’re not concerned with being the best version of themselves, too, well…that’s a sign of entitlement and immaturity.
5. “Not being able to talk honestly about sex and birth/disease control.” — u/mstibbs13
If you’re mature enough to have sex, you should be mature enough to talk about its potential consequences and take the necessary precautions to keep yourself and your partner safe.
6. “Thinking love is gonna ‘fix you’ or solve everything and make your life perfect.” — anonymous
Viewing “love” as a solution to personal problems is a clear path to codependency. If someone expects you to “save” them, they should probably be focusing on themselves instead of getting into a relationship.
7. “Not knowing how to communicate your feelings. This is something people seem to struggle with.” — u/AlligatorFood
Communication doesn’t come easily to everyone, and I can 100% empathize with that. Some people grew up in environments that made honest conversations or voicing concerns feel like walking a minefield. However, it’s a huge red flag if someone isn’t actively working to improve their communication skills or refuses to tell their partner how they’re feeling during conflicts.
8. “When they expect their relationship to be like movies/TV shows and full of overly dramatic ups and downs.” — u/powderedtoastsupreme
Many daters are addicted to drama today. Whether it’s because of the romanticization of toxic love in the media or simply trauma replaying patterns, this is a major red flag that the person has some growing up to do.
9. “Never taking ownership of anything, and placing blame on everyone else.” — u/anonymous
This one is spot on. Unfortunately, many people behave like this without even realizing it. The sad truth is they’re often too far into their victimhood to take accountability for their own actions.
10. “They feel like they’re ‘owed’ a relationship and/or sex for being nice.” — u/InkMage94
This is perhaps the most frustrating type of person. Avoid them at all costs, as their sense of entitlement will only worsen in the relationship.
The post 10 Signs You’re Dating Someone Too Immature for a Relationship appeared first on VICE.
