“I kept my status hidden for decades to protect my family, but now it’s my time to talk,” Jennifer Comstock told Newsweek, 35 years after an AIDS diagnosis left her in denial.
In 1990, Comstock and her first husband were on active duty in the Marine Corps. With her husband due to be sent out to the Persian Gulf, he submitted to a mandatory HIV (human immunodeficiency virus) test, which was positive.
That wasn’t when Comstock learned her fate, as she didn’t know her husband was living with HIV until she visited him in the hospital and noticed countless warnings about HIV on his ward. Comstock was faced with the reality that her husband had been cheating on her with men and may have transmitted HIV.
Just 20 years old, Comstock got tested and then came a perilous wait for the results. A month later, she was given the devastating news that she too was positive.
“As I was on active duty in the Marine Corps, I was expected to be composed and to keep breathing, which I did,” Comstock said. “In those early years, I lived in denial. I just believed I was going to be OK, without any real reason for feeling that way.”
During her first trip to the hospital, Comstock, now 55, learned that her T cells, a type of white blood cell that helps the immune system fight germs, were below 200. The normal range can vary, but The Cleveland Clinic suggests that generally it should be between 500 to 1,200 cells for a healthy adult.
HIV is known to attack white blood cells and causes the body to make fewer T cells.
By the time she learned of her diagnosis, Comstock’s health had already deteriorated significantly. As a result, she was given an automatic AIDS (acquired immunodeficiency syndrome) diagnosis.
Untreated, HIV weakens the immune system and can become AIDS in around 8 to 10 years, according to the Mayo Clinic. People with AIDS are more likely to develop other diseases, causing symptoms such as sweats, chills, recurring fever, fatigue, mouth lesions, and weakness.
Approximately 1.2 million people in the U.S. have HIV, and around 13 percent of them don’t know. In 2022, an estimated 31,800 people acquired HIV in the U.S., with the highest rates in the South.
Following her diagnosis, Comstock was given only 2 years to live and told to “get [her] affairs in order” before she passed.
“It definitely makes you live life to the fullest,” she said. “I did what I wanted to do. I joined the military, in a large part to be able to afford college. But then I thought, why bother? I won’t live to graduate, so I’d rather not spend my time studying. By my 40s, I went to college and graduated cum laude with a degree in history. I’ve never done anything by halves since my diagnosis. I give my full self to everything and everyone I am involved with.”
She’s been taking ART (antiretroviral therapy) since 1997, which prevents the disease from transmitting if there’s an undetectable viral load.
In 1994, Comstock met her second husband who was HIV negative. She dreaded having to tell him that she has AIDS, assuming he’d walk away before their relationship even got started.
“Instead, he said he didn’t care if we had 2 years or 20,” Comstock said.
Ultimately, they had 30 wonderful years together and Comstock welcomed three children, all HIV negative. When they vowed to love each other in sickness and in health, they both truly meant it.
“I ended up being the one taking care of him after he had an aortic dissection in 2007. I took care of him through two open heart surgeries and 17 years of bad health. You just never know how life is going to work out,” Comstock told Newsweek. “My husband and I always wanted to travel. It wasn’t always easy when my husband was sick, but we always said we could be sick at home, or sick somewhere exciting.”
Life has thrown many challenges at Comstock, but she’s remained resilient. In recent years, Comstock sadly lost her husband and son (both unrelated to HIV). She’s battled many illnesses, but her health is much better now, and the disease is undetectable.
Her immune system was severely damaged before ART medication became available. Indeed, if that breakthrough didn’t occur when it did, Comstock thinks she “wouldn’t have made it” because she was incredibly sick.
There were complications at first, including cardiomyopathy, heart failure, pneumonia and mini strokes, but Comstock isn’t certain if they were caused by HIV or the medication.
“Some of those early meds were much harsher than the newer ones,” she said.
Despite being told she only had two years left, Comstock has gained a college degree, started a family, and become a qualified travel advisor.
Comstock has been living with AIDS for 35 years and no longer feels like she has to live in secret. She stayed silent to protect her children, but now that they’re grown up, she is using her voice to educate and raise awareness.
She created a TikTok account (@positivejen) to discuss her diagnosis, answer questions, and to break the stigma.
“I am here and so many are not,” she said. “Someone needs to speak up, especially for women. I want people to understand that people living with HIV are normal. We have kids, husbands, careers, full lives. HIV is something we have, not who we are. HIV doesn’t define me.”
She added: “I have people from all over the world contacting me for advice. So many are just happy to see someone like me living a normal life. I often have to correct people posting misinformation. AIDS denialism is still alive and well—it’s not like 1990, but it’s still there.”
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