I often tell people, “Do what you want. Nothing’s real,” when posed with a question of whether or not I agree with a respective decision (I know, I know, it’s nihilistic), but sometimes… I’m not sure I’d even agree with my own advice.
Take, for example, the case of longtime black metal band Profantica, which recently sold a vial of their vocalist/drummer Paul Ledney’s semen at the merch booth. The below image began making the rounds on social media, and we have no reason to believe it’s fake, even though it’s entirely possible the “semen” isn’t actually a bodily fluid and they’re just fucking around?
Considering we’re talking about a band with song titles such as “Black Cum” and Thy Kingdom Cum,” I’d say we’re better off erring on the side of it being real. (They also have songs titled “Pious Piece of Shit” and “Fuck the Blood of The Lamb” so I shudder to think what could pop up on their merch table in the future.)
Maybe the wildest part of this whole story, according to Metal Injection, is that someone actually bought the cum vial.
Here’s the thing… I have a tendency to buy insane or offensive things that I find interesting just for the sake of owning them. But… I can’t imagine a situation where I would feel confident enough to walk up to someone at a band merch table to get a shirt, see this, and say, “You know what, why don’t you throw in that bottle of cum too.”
Also, from the photo, it looks like such a small bottle that we have to give Ledney some respect for having a steady hand and precision aim. (Ugh, yeah, that felt gross, sorry.)
Profantica is currently in the midst of a headlining U.S. tour with grind bands Knoll and Unidad Trauma, which wraps up in Portland, Maine, in August.
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