Pearl earrings used to say timeless, classy, maybe even a little flirty. Now, they might just say “undateable.”
A new theory gaining traction on TikTok claims that men see pearl-wearing women as intimidating, high-maintenance, or “too expensive to approach”—and that those dainty little studs could be why some women keep striking out. It’s called the pearl earring theory, and whether it started as a joke or not, it’s spiraling.
“Recently I’ve been realizing I’m chronically single,” said creator Morgan Mcguire (@morganmcguire). “No wonder I’m single, I’m decked out in pearls. Truly, it’s everywhere.” In her viral video, she shows off pearl earrings, a pearl necklace, even pearl-accented nails. She doesn’t think she looks intimidating, but TikTok seems to disagree.
“Am I single by choice or is it because of the pearl earring theory?” one woman asks, deadpan, in overlay text.
The Pearl Earring Theory Explained
Others chimed in with their own takes. “This explains everything,” one user wrote. “I’ve worn pearl earrings since high school. I’m 27 now. Always had a failed relationship.” Another admitted she wore them on her wedding day. One said she’s been wearing pearls since infancy, thanks to a family tradition, and refuses to stop now.
But the theory’s reach doesn’t end at jewelry. It’s now being compared to the “red nail theory”—the idea that men find red nail polish attractive because it reminds them of maternal figures.
“I’ve never been asked out on so many dates or complimented so much as I have in the past two or three weeks with these nails,” said TikTok user Melisse Martineau. “I’ve been asked out on five or six dates.” For her, the theory checks out.
There’s no science backing either claim, but plenty of anecdotal “evidence”. And that’s the internet’s sweet spot: blame your dating life on your accessories, not the exhausting, algorithmic circus of modern romance.
Relationship trends like this aren’t exactly new. Women have long been told to tone it down—smile less, but also smile more; look good, but not too good. Now, apparently, you need to run your jewelry through a focus group.
If pearls really are triggering some sort of dating fight-or-flight response, that says a lot more about male insecurity than it does about gemstones.
And honestly? Pearls are pulling more weight than the guys complaining about them. Wear them anyway.
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