Christie Brinkley’s relationship with love is as continuous as her long modeling career. The similarities, however, end there.
“I love being in love,” said Ms. Brinkley, 71, likening it to “a glass of champagne — everything’s bubbling inside, anything’s possible.”
She has been married four times and has been in numerous relationships. Her first marriage, to the French artist Jean-François Allaux, was in 1975 when she was 21; that lasted six years. She was married to the musician Billy Joel from 1985 to 1994; the real estate developer Richard Taubman, from 1994 to 1995; and the architect Peter Cook, from 1996 to 2008. Other serious relationships included Olivier Chandon de Brailles, a French racecar driver and the heir to the Moët & Chandon champagne fortune, who died in a car crash, and the singer John Mellencamp.
Each hopeful partner followed by heartbreak is recounted in her memoir, “Uptown Girl,” which was released in April. The book also carefully documents Ms. Brinkley’s life, moments of singleness, motherhood — she has three children: Alexa Ray, 39, Jack, 30, and Sailor, 26 — a near-death experience, and her career.
“The book was a cleanser for me,” said Ms. Brinkley. “Writing my book made me do a big review of my life. I learned to pat myself on the back and say, ‘You’ve been through it, and you’ve done good.’ I managed to make it through.”
Below is a condensed and edited version of a Zoom interview from her house in Sag Harbor, N.Y.
Can you describe your past weddings?
Small weddings are best. Jean-François and I were married barefoot on the beach in Hawaii. It was beautiful. We swam right up to the ceremony. Billy and I were married on a boat in front of the Statue of Liberty in New York Harbor. With Ricky, I was married on the highest mountain in Telluride. I was pregnant and skiing down a mountain in a wedding gown. I didn’t know anybody at the wedding. My own friends wouldn’t come because they weren’t into him. The only people I knew were my family. I married Peter in the backyard of a rented house in the Hamptons with horses and cows. Billy was my favorite wedding.
Looking back, why do you think they ended in divorce?
I married two good ones and two bad ones. Jean-François was love at first sight. We were good for several years, then it was a slow dissolve. I got married too young. I started to feel constrained and regretted being tied down.
With Billy, who captured my heart, my imagination, my everything, there was just too much pressure and drinking, and being overwhelmed with problems. When you become the bad cop, it’s over. If we had been older when it happened, maybe we could have figured it out.
Ricky was a larger-than-life character who married me for my money. Our relationship was complicated by the fact that I was pregnant, and I wanted to make the right decisions. The relationship came on the heels of my divorce from Billy, which I was devastated about.
With Peter, I wanted Jack to have a male figure. I got pregnant with Sailor. I found out he was having an affair. I was married to a stranger who had other lives. I had three children. I wanted to protect them from the fallout and from their life being blown apart. The divorce lasted for years. It was agonizing.
What have you learned about yourself through these experiences?
That I’m too trusting. I’m a fool for love. That love takes work. Sometimes you need to rely on experts. I wish I could have found ways to save some; I wish I hadn’t married others. I always believed in soul mates. I thought I had four of them. Now I’m not sure. Maybe I had my two soul mates with Jean and Billy. Maybe I rushed out of my marriage to Jean. Maybe I should have tried to make it work longer with Billy. I did start to wonder if maybe it’s me — If I was unlovable.
Did you think you were?
My parents convinced me that I was lovable. I’m not unlovable, but the relationships I was in made me feel unloved. I have enough self-esteem to know that in the right arms, I’m lovable. And I wasn’t loved correctly. One loved my money more than me. Another loved his drink more than me. Another loved young women more than me. And in my first one, I loved my freedom more than him.
Are you still looking for a partner?
Everything I’ve been through, all the pain, the stupidity, I would do it again because I believe in love. I think it would be sad not to. I’m not sure I want to give up the freedom I have now. It gets harder to meet people and harder to trust. It would take a special person to get me to want to share my life. I have made peace without having it. I have been making it through without a man for a lot of years. I don’t need a person to make me happy. I’m happy. But I have so much happiness in me, I would love to share it with someone I love.
What do you regret most?
Not being able to sit with an open photo album with my husband and go, “Look, remember this? Remember the kids?”
What would you do differently next time?
I’d spend more time getting to know someone and their friends and family — because your friends are a reflection of you — before I dive in. Maybe being friends first instead of getting so intimately involved. I’d be less trusting and ask more questions.
What relationship advice would you give your children?
Look for a good sense of humor because laughter will get you through a lot. Keep your relationships with your friends because they help you get through a lot. Don’t just focus on your husband or your wife. Stay involved in your life as well. If you know you have true love, work at keeping it alive.
Through writing this book, what have you learned?
Putting this book together and seeing the highs and lows, and how miserable some of the lows were, I’ve kept finding the silver linings. I’ve looked at some of the bad things as little gifts. That propelled me. That made me discover strength that I didn’t know I had, or made me stand up and say, ‘I’ll prove you wrong, and I’ll do this.’ It moved me forward.
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