I became a mom in my 40s. It made me healthier, more creative, and bold enough to launch a business during naptime.

I became a mom in my 40s, somewhat unexpectedly.

I enrolled to be a foster parent during the pandemic, when a massive shortage of homes had thousands of kids in limbo, and my social worker friends were fully panicked. My plan was to be a short-term stop for older kids between placements. But the day after my license was approved, a caseworker called: could I take an infant for three days?

He never left. We finalized the adoption a few years ago.

And yes, I’ve had the usual revelations: coffee is a food group, no one can live up to the standard set by Chilli and Bandit (iykyk), and I’ll never understand what temperature a toddler should wear a jacket.

But the real plot twist? Motherhood didn’t just reshape my life — it leveled everything up.

Being a mom made me better at my job

Take creativity, for example. I work in public relations, where my job is to come up with wild, original ideas for brands. Pre-kid, I was objectively pretty good at it.

But then I met my son, who can turn a stick into a spaceship, a spoon into a villain, and me into a fire-breathing dragon if I’m not paying attention. We invent games, rewrite bedtime stories, and go on elaborate scavenger hunts for lost socks.

All that unfiltered, spontaneous play? It’s made me better at my job. I develop ideas faster, take more creative risks, and see potential where I used to see limitations.

Then there’s food. Left to my own devices, I could survive on protein shakes, wine, and anything I could label “charcuterie.” But now I’m modeling behavior, and no one wants to raise a kid who thinks pirates don’t eat vegetables. So we cook. We meal plan. We garden (badly, but enthusiastically). Our zucchini has a name. I make sure dinner includes at least two colors that didn’t come from a pouch. And somewhere along the way, I started to enjoy it.

Motherhood made me brave

Parenting also turned me into a psychology nerd. I read parenting books like they’re juicy thrillers. And all those lessons about emotional regulation, collaborative problem-solving, and the fine art of not losing your cool when someone licks the wall — they translate beautifully to adult relationships, too. I manage friendships, family, and even clients with more grace.

But the biggest surprise? Motherhood made me brave.

This year, as a solo parent to a young child, I did something that sounds unhinged: I left a stable job and started my own business. No backup plan. No second income. Just a belief that if I could keep a tiny human alive through a pandemic, I could build a company I was proud of — one that reflects my values and works with brands I genuinely love. Would I have done that pre-kid? Probably not. But parenting teaches you how to do hard things while covered in yogurt. After that, filing for an LLC feels manageable.

I built a chosen family with intention

Maybe the most unexpectedly tender part of parenting later in life is that it’s made me build a chosen family with intention. Not the “let’s grab drinks sometime” kind of friends, but the “text me your kid’s shoe size” and “yes, I’ll bring lasagna” kind.

My bio-family is wonderful, but lives in another state, so here at home we’ve assembled a patchwork of neighbors, longtime friends, and honorary aunties who rally for playdates, preschool pickups, and emotionally fragile Thursdays. We joke about buying land and starting a commune. It’s never felt more joyful.

So yes, I’m a slightly older mom. But I’m not quoting “wine o’clock” memes or losing the plot over a juice box. I’m still sharp, still curious, still me, just with more stain remover in my purse.

Motherhood didn’t shrink my world; it widened it. I take bigger swings now. I care more deeply. I started a business, survived potty training, and convinced a 4-year-old that bok choy is “leafy spaghetti.” If my 30-something self met me now, she’d think I was kind of a badass. Also, she’d definitely steal my moisturizer.

There’s no ideal age to become a parent. But for me, this was the perfect time. I have enough life behind me to have perspective, and enough ahead of me to make it count. I’m not trying to be the coolest mom at the park. I’m just trying to be the one who shows up — curious, committed, and occasionally armed with dinosaur-shaped snacks.

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