I am leaving my job in a couple of months. I have about one month of sick days stored up, which I would like to count as my last month of work. This would allow me to continue to have health insurance and get paid for a month without actually working. My partner argues that this would be unethical/dishonest because I wouldn’t be sick (as far as I can tell at this point); I argue that sick time is a benefit that the company has given, and I am free to use it as I choose. (I do in theory have some elective doctor’s appointments I could go to.) I’ve used sick leave sparingly until now and even worked through illness in the past out of dedication to my work and not wanting to let down our customers, but now that I’m leaving the company, I have a “use it or lose it” mentality.
The company’s policy on this is unclear (and until now nobody has verified whether occasional sick times were because of illness), but regardless of the policy, I am curious how my proposed decision would be seen through an ethical framework. — Name Withheld
From the Ethicist:
Sick days are a peculiar currency in American office life. They accumulate in small piles, like poker chips at a casino, but you’re not meant to cash them in on your way out the door. Your firm seems to have an unusually generous policy with respect to the accrual of sick days. All the same, they’re a contingent benefit: You get them only if you need them. You may tell yourself you’ve “earned” these days; what you’ve actually earned is the right to draw on them when needed, not the right to turn them into a monthlong victory lap. To use them when you’re not ill, just because nobody’s checking up on you, is to take advantage of a system based on trust. “Use it or lose it,” you say, but what you’re proposing is more a case of use as abuse.
There’s the wider impact to consider, too. As a rule, when people are absent, their work doesn’t simply disappear — it shifts to others. Every extra day you’re gone can mean more emails, more tasks and more pressure for those still on the job. Even if no one complains, people notice the added burden. No doubt there are offices so overstaffed or indifferent that an absence causes no ripples at all, but most places aren’t quite that frictionless.
If you need time off for health-related reasons — mental health counts, and so do visits to the doctor — take it. But that’s not a license to burn through every last day simply because you can. A reputation for leaving others in the lurch may stick around longer than you do.
A Bonus Question
In a previous relationship, my ex and I created, starred in and sold adult films together. It was always primarily her venture, with my role being filming and acting. She fronted all the costs and kept the money from sales. I was, and am, completely fine with this arrangement. My question is: Do I owe it to my ex to ask her if she’s comfortable with my keeping the recordings I still have? The final products are still for sale, and I am not sharing or monetizing the unedited footage I still have. Under ordinary circumstances I think an ex should have a say in whether explicit material from the relationship is kept, but this is a commercial product we made together, and it is still available online. Are the rules around intimate recordings different when they were intentionally made for sale? — Name Withheld
From the Ethicist:
These films surely involved some measure of vulnerability, and your sensitivity about the old footage is commendable. But given that these were commercial ventures, intended for an audience, your keeping private, unshared footage presents no obvious violation of privacy or breach of trust. It’s also relevant that the footage is part of your own life story, not just something you watched from the sidelines.
It would be another matter entirely if you were releasing the outtakes for public consumption or showing them to friends. But I don’t see that you need permission for privately revisiting your own past. If you want to go the extra mile, checking in with your ex could be a thoughtful gesture, though you haven’t indicated that she has raised any concerns. The main thing is that these aides-mémoire remain private. As so many director’s cuts make clear, some material is best left unshared.
Readers Respond
The previous question was about the moral obligation to warn potential neighbors about a black-mold problem. They wrote: “The home next door is rented out by an absentee landlord. We became friendly with the previous tenants, who moved out very abruptly a couple of weeks ago. We learned from them that the house is infested with black mold, as identified by a professional testing company, and they shared the results with us.
“The mold issue was serious enough to cause health issues for the previous tenants. To our knowledge, the landlord has done nothing to mitigate this issue, and now he has listed the house for rent again. Our concern is that we’ve seen families with small children looking at the house. We believe that we might be in legal jeopardy if we were to inform prospective tenants about the mold issue, but what is our moral obligation?”
In his response, the Ethicist noted: “You’re not under a moral obligation to act, and you wouldn’t be wrong to stay out of it. But this is the kind of gesture that, when well informed, can make the world a little better. If a child were to suffer because no one spoke up, you might wish you had said something. If you were the one about to move in, you would want to know.” (Reread the full question and answer here.)
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I’m an M.D. who treats a lot of mold illness called CIRS — chronic inflammatory response syndrome. This is a multisystem, multiorgan inflammatory disorder that makes people very, very sick. I always encourage patients who need to leave their moldy house to be honest and open about this awful problem. — Dr. Kim
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As someone whose entire family had health issues because of black mold, I can say with confidence that it would have meant a lot if someone had warned us about what we were getting ourselves into with that house. So how about sending the report to the listing agent anonymously? And, if you can, have a friendly and informative chat with potential renters when you see them. — Elizabeth
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Suggesting the writer contact the listing agent about the mold issue is a good idea, but it’s unclear whether the property is being rented through an agent or directly by the owner. I recommend the writer reach out to the local health department or city building inspector if the mold problem is confirmed. — Paula
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Do not write a letter to the landlord about mold in the home; it’s none of your business and the landlord might angrily tell you so. Do not tell the listing agent about mold in the home; it’s none of your business, and the agent has no obligation to believe you. If prospective tenants spot or smell mold or mildew, they can take the property off their list and check out the next home. There are legal rights future tenants can assert, and other rights they may have to claim. If the landlord does not satisfy them, then it’s time to talk to plaintiff lawyers, who know how to deal with this challenge. — Larry
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Absolutely disclose the information! As someone who two years ago bought a home where the previous owner did not disclose black mold, it was like walking into a nightmare. It has taken these two years of hard work and all my savings to make it livable. A couple of neighbors did know about the condition, though they were not aware of the impending sale. It would have made a huge difference to know. I would have walked away in a heartbeat. — Kate
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I am a landlord in Arizona. I fill out a lengthy disclosure form for any potential tenants before they sign a lease. Any past problems — flooding, insects, broken pipes and especially mold — are be disclosed. We purchased a house and discovered mold afterward, which was not disclosed by the seller. We tore out all the walls with a mold remediation company and had it inspected and certified mold-free. But I still disclose this past issue to any new tenant. — Nancy
Kwame Anthony Appiah is The New York Times Magazine’s Ethicist columnist and teaches philosophy at N.Y.U. To submit a query, send an email to [email protected].
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