(Warning: Spoilers ahead.)
Of all the different killers and criminals that have crossed paths with Charlie Cale (Natasha Lyonne) over two seasons of Poker Face, an eight-year-old girl with pigtails who uses the word “neat-o” might be the most terrifying.
At the halfway point of Season 2, the series created by murder sleuth aficionado Rian Johnson offers an opportunity to mix with the tried-and-tested formula. In a season full of bangers, somehow, an episode without a dead body is the highlight so far.
Okay, that statement about a lack of corpse isn’t accurate, as a beloved class pet is sacrificed so second-grade student Stephanie (Eva Jade Halford) can continue dominating the gold star leaderboard. People have killed for less.
Charlie is no longer on the run from the mafia, but still opts for a nomadic life, moving from town to town as she tries to figure out what to do next. Her listlessness isn’t helped by the Grim Reaper following her across the country, with every new job coinciding with a fatality. In the two episodes since Charlie no longer had a hit on her life, she has witnessed Daisy (an alligator) being used as an accessory to murder in Florida and a baseball-related slaying. You can’t blame Charlie for thinking no blood will be shed while working as a lunch lady at a private school.
However, it wouldn’t be Poker Face without a mystery to solve, and “Sloppy Joseph” still fits the “howcatchem” format. Age doesn’t impact Charlie’s ability to know when someone is lying. The only difference is adjusting bulls— to bullshoot because even a “pigtailed bitch” has sensitive ears.
Charlie has to prove that Stephanie sabotaged her classmate Elijah’s (Callum Vinson) magic trick that resulted in the death of a gerbil called Joseph. Or, if you want to use the more controversial moniker, Joseph Gerbils (spellcheck did try to change this to the name, you know the one). Charlie’s disbelief at said name highlights the playful tone of this episode with an underlying layer of menace that will chill you to your bones.
Using The Prodigy’s menacing “Spitfire” to soundtrack Stephanie’s plotting is an objectively funny choice. Ditto, when the camera later cuts from showing Stephanie running like she is in a movie to the wider shot that reveals the ungraceful way a child sprints down a corridor. Stephanie is given the killer in a horror movie treatment, with director Adam Arkin ensuring this episode walks the line between comic relief and terror, taking cues from Scream. Juggling these elements within the Poker Face parameters makes this an instant classic.
Playing with the Poker Face setup doesn’t mean ditching the Columbo-inspired guest stars. Like Peter Falk before her, Lyonne seeks out actors she has worked with before. Though not in all cases. Instead of casting famous kids to play Stephanie and Elijah, the school staff tick those recognizable boxes. Shout out to Halford and Vinson for nailing the precocious antagonist and the wide-eyed sweet boy framed for gerbil murder.
Two of those reunions with Lyonne demonstrate the length and breadth of her career. David Krumholtz plays Elijah’s father, JB, in Poker Face. However, he first starred with Lyonne, playing siblings in the 1998 coming-of-age Slums of Beverly Hills (Alan Arkin played their father, and his IRL son directed this episode).
Adrienne C. Moore was part of the Orange Is the New Black ensemble and plays teacher Miss Dee in this episode. That Netflix hit marked Lyonne’s comeback—co-star Taylor Schilling is also on the Poker Face guest star list this season. The other big name is forever favorite Margo Martindale, playing a stern principal, Dr. Hamm, who harbors a big secret.
As with previous installments, we see precisely how Stephanie plotted against the unsuspecting Elijah to ensure his magic trick ends in a rodent bloodbath. The reason for her diabolical plan? Elijah won the spelling bee after Stephanie failed to spell “abracadabra” correctly. Stephanie is clearly not a Lady Gaga fan. Elijah was closing in with his number of stars, meaning she had to win the talent show. Or make sure he didn’t.
One of the best visual gags is when Stephanie types into the library computer: “How to murder a boy’s self-esteem?” That perfectly timed beat before she adds self-esteem made me briefly question what this show was about to do. One site suggests, “find the thing they love the most, and kill it forever.” Magic and Joseph fit that description for Elijah. Charlie isn’t wrong when she calls Stephanie a demon.
The primary weapon in Stephanie’s arsenal is an iPad in a girlish pink case that assists her myriad schemes, including blackmailing Dr. Hamm. Stephanie knows humiliation and threatening livelihoods will take her far, making Dr. Hamm wear a friendship bracelet that reads “U R MINE.”
No matter how you describe it, Joseph’s death is borderline traumatizing. Luckily, the extreme crimson splatter delivers an exaggeration that will make you laugh. It isn’t The Substance level, but those kids will need therapy.
Charlie wanted to experience childlike wonder, but she also forgot that being a tween isn’t all playtime and loving life. Miss Dee explains that even at eight years old, these kids are close enough to adolescence to grapple with the forthcoming battlefield. Second graders are testing barriers and putting up walls in anticipation of teenhood. The episode written by Kate Thulin doesn’t patronize the childhood experience. Instead, Charlie is reminded that children are also going through it as much as adults, trying to find their place in the world.
Nevertheless, not even gold star Stephanie can outsmart Charlie, who borrows the iPad blackmail technique to end Stephanie’s reign of terror. Stephanie’s plan to get Elijah kicked out of school fails, and a plot to resurrect Joseph works because kids still want to believe in magic (and not that someone bought another gerbil). Charlie gets to experience the childlike wonder after all. But it is still time to move on because what she is looking for is not here.
As Charlie pulls out of the parking lot in her Plymouth Barracuda, Stephanie stands watching like one of the twins from The Shining. Thankfully, there is only one of her because she is scarier than those ghosts. Charlie’s formidable opponent shows signs that she could end up on that pathological path, but for now, that genie is back in the bottle. Kinda.
Stephanie’s perfect penmanship on her parting note to Charlie is a sinister promise: “When I grow up, I will find you.” Another name that Charlie can add to her list of people to avoid as Poker Face continues to push the mystery-of-the-week to bloody, delightful places.
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