A Generation Z woman has shocked internet viewers after revealing the insults she had to put up with on a first date.
The woman, who wishes to be called Immy, went on a date with a man she matched with on the dating site Hinge. They had been chatting online for around a week, and she didn’t notice any red flags to begin with.
Immy, 21, who is originally from Adelaide, Australia, but resides in Paris, France, told Newsweek that there was “definitely banter and a bit of negging” when they chatted, but it didn’t feel too extreme. Negging is insulting or undermining a person to diminish their self-confidence.
While the guy didn’t seem like Immy’s type at first, she was willing to see how the date went and kept her mind open. The Gen Zer (people born between 1997 and 2012) believes he was a similar age but a few years older, likely around 25 or 26.
“We went out for a few drinks at a random bar in Montmartre,” Immy said. “Usually, I would be really nervous before a first date, but because we already had some good chats, I was less nervous.
She continued: “I got there first, and it was raining. He was about five minutes late, which didn’t really bother me, but within the first 10 minutes of the date is when the insults started.”
Her date called Immy ugly “multiple times” throughout the evening, insulted her outfit, called her dumb, and mocked her in French, while knowing she couldn’t understand what he was saying.
Each time the man made a comment, Immy highlighted his bad manners or had “a sour look” on her face to show how unimpressed she was. By the end of the night, she couldn’t hold back and told the date how “entirely unattractive” his social etiquette, or lack thereof, was.
“He made the ugly comments, called me stupid, made jokes wishing I was underage, and talked about his exes. He told me it was his first Hinge date in two days. He spoke French and was making fun of me with the waiter, who looked uncomfortable at what he was saying, but I couldn’t understand because of the language barrier. He also said that he could never marry me because of the way I look and my tattoos,” Immy said.
She had put so much effort into getting ready and was optimistic, only to be called ugly within minutes of the date starting. The whole evening left Immy feeling shocked and confused, but what upset her the most was realizing that “men think it’s OK to talk to women like that.”
When Immy got home, she couldn’t help but cry at what happened.
Shortly after, she filmed a TikTok video (@immy_mbj) about being called ugly “at least 10 times” on a date and posted it the following day. Immy never imagined it would capture so much attention, but the clip went viral with over 6.9 million views and more than 1.2 million likes on TikTok.
Immy said: “There’s been an overwhelming amount of love from women with similar experiences. I know I’m not ugly, but to see that many people affirming it definitely changes how you view yourself in a positive way.
“Most of all, it was really beautiful to see so many women being kind to each other in the comments. The best thing to come out of it is that I made a platform for women to share, express, and support each other,” Immy added.
She is understandably off dating now, as this was the last straw she could put up with. She isn’t ruling it out in the future, but this experience has made her put “more walls up.”
With almost 30,000 comments on the viral TikTok post, social-media users were full of support for Immy and even shared their own similar experiences.
One comment reads: “Girls, lets normalize leaving when someone is disrespecting you.”
Another TikTok user wrote: “That’s not a first date, that’s a last date.”
A third person responded: “Sweet girl, he was projecting. You are lovely.”
One comment read: “I most certainly hope you did NOT believe him!”
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