May is Mental Health Awareness Month, a time dedicated to breaking the stigma and spreading awareness around various mental health issues. Efforts like these help people feel more comfortable opening up about their own struggles and seeking help.
There’s no doubt that therapy can positively impact relationships. In fact, many of today’s daters view therapy as a prerequisite to getting in a relationship. In other words, some people won’t even date someone if they haven’t spoken to a professional about their mental health.
Therapy as a green flag in dating
The numbers speak for themselves. According to a survey by dating app Hily, among women, 26% of Gen Z and 34% of Millennials say it’s important that their potential partner was or had been in therapy. Men, on the other hand, were a bit less concerned about it, with only 15% of Gen Z men and 25% of Millennial men saying it mattered to them.
However, there are some people who won’t even consider dating someone who hasn’t been in therapy: 23% of young women and 16% of men say they’re unlikely to do so.
When you consider the many benefits of speaking to a professional about your mental health, it’s no surprise to learn how helpful it can be in a relationship context. People who are in individual therapy might learn more about themselves, their strengths and weaknesses, how to emotionally regulate themselves, and how to healthily maintain relationships with other people.
That being said, 53% of women and nearly 40% of men believe it’s easier to build a healthy relationship with someone who has been or currently is in therapy. Furthermore, 45% of Gen Z and 55% of Millennial women, as well as 32% of Gen Z and 43% of Millennial men, believe that people who are in therapy are more romantically appealing—likely for the above reasons.
The stigma of therapy in dating
If there’s one thing for certain, it’s that—for most daters—therapy isn’t a turn-off as it once may have been in the past. Therapy used to be taboo, with many viewing it almost as a red flag of sorts. Countless individuals would even try to hide the fact that they were speaking to a professional, filled with shame and believing there was something wrong with them.
But thankfully, the stigma against therapy seems to be lessening, with 86% of young Americans feeling comfortable dating someone with therapy experience.
However, there are some highly critical daters. In fact, 27% of young women and 20% of men have felt judged by a date for being in therapy. Whether that was actually the case or merely a projection is, of course, unclear. I mean, many of us have grown up with a strong stigma against therapy, so it could go either way.
But with 59.2 million adults in the U.S. having received mental health treatment or therapy in 2023, the stigma will likely—hopefully—continue to lessen, especially as more people reap its benefits.
I, for one, would not be where I am today without my therapists over the years. I started therapy when I was only six years old and diagnosed with obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD). If I hadn’t continued therapy throughout my life, I likely would never have been able to graduate college, build a successful career, chase my dreams, live alone, or fall in (healthy) love.
If someone truly is judging you for seeking mental health support, then they’re probably not your soulmate. In fact, for 55% of young women and 35% of men, that condemnatory mindset is a major non-starter. As it should be.
The post Your Future Partner Wants You to Go to Therapy appeared first on VICE.
