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My kids began thinking about student loans in high school. I’m proud of their decisions to try to avoid crippling debt.

May 2, 2025
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college students working on their computers
The author’s kids looked for ways to save on college costs.

Gabriel Trujillo/Getty Images

Some of the big conversations around our house in the past few years have been about our kids’ future. My husband and I have four children, ranging in age from teens to young adults. My oldest graduates from college this year, so we’ve had many talks about school and the future.

One of my biggest worries when the kids were younger was how we would pay their college tuition. I was a stay-at-home mom for most of their childhoods. We didn’t have a lot of extra income to save for four college educations. I knew we wouldn’t take out parent loans while edging ever closer to retirement either.

My husband and I plan to help each of them a little, but we can’t foot the total bill for all of them.

I didn’t realize that as I was mulling over these challenges, when the kids hit their teen years, they were thinking about them, too.

My oldest chose a state school

When my son and I discussed the schools where he planned to apply, I noticed they were all just a few hours from home. I mentioned that to him, and he told me he was focusing on state schools because they offered lower tuition.

He also took advantage of a stipend that our state provides for students who stay in-state for college.

Ultimately, he’ll graduate with about the same amount of student debt I had almost 30 years ago. Mine was a little high for the time, but I think that’s pretty good for a three-decade time difference.

Meanwhile, his younger brother will graduate from high school in another year. He’s considering some schools that are part of a tuition exchange program. He would be able to attend an out-of-state school but pay in-state tuition.

My daughter chose to take classes at a community college

In between my boys, I have a daughter. After high school, she took a year off to work. She’s now going to our local community college in the mornings and continuing to work in the afternoons.

She’s completing all her general education credits and working toward an associate degree. After that, she plans to transfer to a four-year college.

Even if she chooses an expensive school (she doesn’t plan to), she’d have half as much debt as many people because she’ll only need two years to get a bachelor’s degree.

Right now, her community college isn’t incurring any debt at all. Between the in-state stipend she gets like her brother, and the lower costs, my husband and I can pay her tuition.

My three older kids have also taken some college classes offered at their high school, as well as some AP classes and tests. This has saved them money because they are racking up some college credits without paying for those college classes.

I’ve given all of my kids some basic advice on college debt

I’m not a financial genius by any means. But there are a few things I wanted our kids to know before they chose a college.

I encouraged them to seriously consider public universities. While attending a prestigious, expensive university might help in some careers, you can get an excellent education and great job prospects at a state school.

I also told my kids that taking out student loans without graduating is a terrible financial decision. I know there are times when it’s unavoidable, and I’m sure someone somewhere has a story about how doing this was the best thing for them. But generally speaking, taking out loans and not ending up with the higher earning potential that a college degree gives you is a bad idea.

Sometimes, the best option is to trade a dream school for a manageable, affordable life after graduation. So maybe one of the most useful lessons my kids learned happened before they even went to college. They learned that life is full of trade-offs, and I’m glad they’re thinking about them, even while they’re still in high school.

The post My kids began thinking about student loans in high school. I’m proud of their decisions to try to avoid crippling debt. appeared first on Business Insider.

Tags: collegecrippling debtdegreefuturehigh schoolhusbandin-statekidlocal community collegestate schoolstipendstudentstudent loanyearyoung brother
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