Jimmy Kimmel thinks he’s figured out why President Donald Trump caused so much instability on the stock market.
Wall Street was sent into chaos after the president announced sweeping tariffs on dozens of countries across the world last week. The result saw the worst two-day loss in United States stock market history before the president announced a “pause” on America’s trading partners, except for China.
“Maybe [Trump] did it to distract us from all the other horrible stuff,” Kimmel said in his monologue Thursday.
The late night host continued, “Maybe he did it to distract us from the fact that they’re deporting college students and firing the people in charge of fighting disease and fires, and he’s attacking judges and journalists and lawyers.”
“He’s taking lunch and life-saving medications away from children who need it,” Kimmel added. “Not to mention helping his buddy Putin crush Ukraine, and menacing Canada and Greenland of all places.”
Kimmel had begun his monologue by showing a string of right-wing pundits declaring that Trump’s recent partial pause on tariffs (and the brief market bounce that followed) was all part of Trump’s plan.
“If that was the plan, congratulations,” Kimmel joked. “Because in one week the plan lost $6 trillion, and every country in the world hates us now.”
Kimmel declared, “We have a monkey flying the plane right now, and almost half the passengers are like, ‘I think the monkey’s doing a good job.‘”
“Look out the windows, gang,” Kimmel told Trump supporters. “The plane’s pointing down.”
Among all the “bootlicking” pundits praising Trump at the moment, Kimmel singled out Newsmax’s Carl Higbie for his particularly extreme take on Trump’s actions.
He played a clip of Higbie telling Newsmax viewers, “We were just presented with our generation’s version of the post-Pearl Harbor posters that went up that said … ‘I want you for the U.S. Army.’ Trump wanted you to put America first and yourself second for a week, and most people couldn’t do it.”
“You selfish monsters,” Kimmel joked. “You couldn’t just let him drain your 401K to get those damn Norwegians in line?No?”
“That’s quite a metaphor,” Kimmel added. “‘This is like post-Pearl Harbor—’ No, this is like if we had bombed Pearl Harbor ourselves.”
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