For exhausted parents dealing with babies who wake up for hours in the middle of the night, the tried-and-tested advice is to do everything possible to get them back to sleep.
But a holistic and gentle sleep consultant, OCN level 6-trained Hannah Hiles, suggests a different approach—one that might just make nights easier for both babies and parents.
“A split night is where a child will wake for an extended period during the night, usually a couple of hours,” Hiles told Newsweek. “They are either caused by brain development or under-tiredness.”
When babies enter deep sleep cycles, their brains go through major developmental leaps—also known as sleep regressions. This can lead to them waking up for long stretches, sometimes just to practice new skills like blowing raspberries, Hiles said.
However, the more common cause of split nights is under-tiredness. “This means they’ve had too much daytime sleep, too early a bedtime or both,” Hiles explained. “Under tiredness can make split nights chronic and its really difficult to overcome them.”
Hiles knows this feeling all too well. In a clip on Instagram (@ittakesavillage_baby_sleep), she turned a split night into her advantage when her 15-month-old son woke up at 11 p.m.—something she attributes to putting him to bed too early.
“I was extremely exhausted as a breastfeeding and co-sleeping mom of two and I didn’t want to lie in a dark room for two hours while he was upset willing him back to sleep,” she told Newsweek.
Instead, Hiles got a popsicle for her son (who was teething), watched cartoons together and had cuddles. She was pleased to report that her toddler was happy and she wasn’t as stressed. After a couple of hours, he got tired again and she took him back to bed.
The clip, which has been viewed over 3 million times, garnered a mixed response from viewers.
“You’re training his body to wake up and eat at night. This is not good for good long term sleep habits,” one user wrote.
Another parent of three children said Hiles was doing herself and her son a disservice.
“Most of the messages out there are that split nights are a ‘behavior’ and you basically need to force your child back to sleep,” Hiles said. “This isn’t true and the science doesn’t back this.”
Others also accused Hiles of being a “bad parent” for allowing her son to watch screens and eat a sugary snack during night hours.
“Many commenters… felt strongly that I was setting a precedent and he would wake up every night and want the same,” she said.
But that hasn’t happened, and Hiles reported that her son hasn’t had a split night since.
“Split nights should be survived in the moment and solved in the morning, and many families I’ve worked with have used this method and its worked well for them,” she said.
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