Nina Alexandra Niles reached out to John William Hanifin IV on Hinge in a burst of spirited camaraderie.
“Hell yeah I went to Comic-Con this year as Batgirl of Burnside,” she said, noticing the last of his profile photos in October 2021: He was wearing a sparkly gold Daft Punk robot costume.
Mr. Hanifin, 31, who goes by Billy, was then wowed by one of her photos in full Zombie makeup, and eager to see her Batgirl creation.
“Do you have pics?” asked Mr. Hanifin, who graduated with a bachelor’s degree in computer science and a master’s degree in cybersecurity from Fordham. He is now a development operations security engineer at Coveware, a ransomware remediation company.
He found the Batgirl photos through her Instagram link on Hinge, and was dazzled by eight other costumes, particularly a green Scottish Highlands-style gown she wore as Merida from Disney’s “Brave” to the Renaissance Faire in Tuxedo, N.Y., in September.
“I like making elaborate costumes,” said Ms. Niles, 35, who has been hand sewing since high school. She graduated with a bachelor’s degree in mechanical engineering from Northwestern, and is now a business control manager at JPMorgan Chase.
To their amazement, they each had been to Comic-Con in October, and the Renaissance Faire, one day apart.
But, a date had to wait.
“We’re both Halloween nuts,” she said, and it was peak season.
He had three parties and was hosting one at his apartment in Astoria, Queens. She was scrambling to finish her 1930s floor-length gown for the annual University Club Halloween dinner dance.
After work, two weeks later, they met at Break Bar and Billiards in Astoria, a game bar he chose in case they ran out of things to say.
He was intrigued by her rant on female superheroes in the Marvel film universe, but 20 minutes into the date was caught off-guard when she nonchalantly invited him to see the latest, “Shang-Chi and the Legend of Ten Rings,” which he had already seen with his college buddies, like every Marvel release since 2012.
“You’re asking me on a second date?” said Mr. Hanifin, teasing her for being so bold, and agreed to see it again.
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They parted with a hug before she took the subway home to NoHo in Manhattan, and the next week, they saw the movie at a Midtown Manhattan theater with cushy seats, and halfway through it, snuggled. They then gushed over Awkwafina’s supporting role at Tir Na Nog, a nearby pub, and later kissed good night.
During their third date, in November, at a cocktail bar in Chinatown, they discussed becoming exclusive. She was game, but he needed a little more time.
“I’m ready,” he said, in December as they stopped under the lights while at New York Botanical Garden’s holiday train night. “Let’s make this a thing.”
He joined her for her parents’ Christmas party at their Upper West Side brownstone, where she grew up. They then spent two weeks apart preparing for the holidays and while he visited his family in Boston, where he grew up.
He then quarantined another two weeks with Covid in Astoria. She made two trips there to drop off Covid tests, but became miffed when he barely acknowledged her. To apologize, he sent her a dozen roses, and an electric blanket — she’s always cold at bedtime.
“He is so clever, so brilliant, so thoughtful,” she recalled thinking, and they began dating seriously.
In March she joined him and friends on a trip to Walt Disney World Resort in Florida, and on the flight home they sketched out ideas to re-create the Haunted Mansion.
“It was ridiculous, impractical, and entirely us,” she said.
“That’s when we knew,” he said.
In summer 2022, they dressed up for their first 1920s jazz age lawn party on Governors Island — she in a purple drop waist dress; he in pinstriped pants, suspenders and arm garters.
Later that year, Ms. Niles joined Mr. Hanifin and his Renaissance Faire pals as medieval nomads and for Comic-Con he updated his Daft Punk costume and she went as Ginny Weasley from “Harry Potter” in a Quidditch outfit.
“We were trying to fit our hobbies into one apartment,” he said, as he moved into hers in January 2023. “Plus we rented a storage locker in the basement.”
That October, during their second annual trip to Sleepy Hollow, he proposed.
“It feels amazing to get proposed to,” she said, and then proposed to him in December. “It’s not as much about feminism, but equality.”
On Feb. 1, Kelty Niles, the bride’s sister, who received a one-day marriage officiant license from the Office of the City Clerk of New York, officiated before 192 guests at the University Club in Manhattan.
Ms. Niles wore a white Duchess satin gown she made based on a 1950s Vogue pattern.
Mr. Hanifin gave a nod to his Scottish roots in a MacNeil tartan kilt, and changed into a tuxedo for the reception, where the couple glided across the floor in a choreographed first dance with lifts and twirls to Elton John’s “Your Song.”
“We’re already planning for our next Jazz Age lawn party,” she said.
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