LONDON — So long 2024, we hardly knew ye.
It’s been a mammoth year in British politics.
Rishi Sunak gambled on a snap election and lost. Nigel Farage made a jaw-dropping comeback. And Labour Leader Keir Starmer took the keys to 10 Downing Street, before spending the rest of the year as though he didn’t really know where he’d last put them.
As the dust settles on another wild one, let POLITICO help you reminisce by rattling through, in no particular order, the 37 words on every extremely-online political type’s lips this year.
TWO-TIER JUSTICE: A big talking point of comeback kid Nigel Farage and his fans. They argued that the British justice system treated white and far-right people more harshly, a theory described by one top cop this year as “nonsense” and a sign that “people don’t want to listen to the facts.” Welcome to the 2020s, pal.
ELON: The Musk man Farage desperately wanted to woo — and Prime Minister Keir Starmer desperately wanted to mute on X. A noted scholar on the finer points of the British justice system.
GAMBLEGATE: Member of a deeply unpopular party heading for electoral oblivion? May as well make *checks notes* £500 on the way out.
STORM SHADOW: A huge and serious debate about deepening U.K. involvement in Ukraine centered on missiles with a Bond villain name. Allowed lots of boring political journalists to feel like they were in a film for a little bit.
SUPERMAJORITY: Known by normies as a “working majority,” Sunak tried out this one to terrify pensioners about an unchecked, rabidly Marxist Starmer on the loose.
FIXING THE FOUNDATIONS: What newbie Prime Minister Starmer is doing with the British economy, apparently. Because Britain is a damp home, sinking slowly into the abyss.
BORDER SECURITY COMMAND: A tough new name for lots of things that kinda already existed, as Labour tried to show it really, really wants to combat illegal migration and can do a scary mean face.
CHAGOS ISLANDS: See also, surrender, betrayal, Google Maps.
UNLEASHED: Boris Johnson’s brief comeback book, now selling at a tasty half-price in most branches of WHSmith.
BLACK HOLE: A giant void in the middle of British politics absorbing all intelligent life. Apparently worth £22 billion.
WORKING PEOPLE: Still undefined. But definitely not going to be taxed again. Maybe.
MILESTONES/MISSIONS/FIRST STEPS: Three novel ways of communicating to the British public that you don’t really know how to describe your vague plan for government.
CHICKEN RUN: The phenomenon of Tory MPs suddenly discovering a deep and abiding love for constituencies miles away from their old patches which happen to be more favorable to the Tories.
DEEP STATE: What thwarted Liz Truss’ agenda, beyond Liz Truss herself.
VETTING: What Farage’s Reform UK failed to do with its most, er, interesting election candidates.
SMOKE FREE: Labour and Tories teamed up (kinda) to stop today’s whipper-snappers from ever enjoying the cool, refreshing taste of cancer sticks.
LANYARDS: Short-lived “Minister for Common Sense” Esther McVey unsuccessfully tried to ban civil servants from wearing “woke” versions of these. Not that Sunak’s Conservatives totally ran out of ideas or anything.
FAMILY FARM TAX: Conservative framing of Labour’s agricultural inheritance tax changes. See also: Jeremy Clarkson, the next prime minister?
HONEY TRAP: In which POLITICO revealed that MPs really, really shouldn’t be using WhatsApp.
NORMAL: Conservative leadership contender James Cleverly’s bold pitch to the party faithful. He followed it up by accidentally getting his supporters to vote him out of the contest. The “most sophisticated electorate in the world,” indeed.
RESET: Starmer’s post-Brexit attempts to cuddle up to Europe by boldly offering nothing on youth mobility and also trying to be besties with Donald Trump.
RWANDA: It’s easy to forget how defining the plan to deport migrants to Rwanda was for Sunak’s Tory party, before he went and blew it all up by calling the election. Definitely £700 million well spent.
FREEBIE: Why do so many middle-aged politicians pretend to love Taylor Swift?
BRAT: Middle-aged men also proudly related to Charli XCX’s summer smash “Brat.” To be fair, Boris Johnson is “a little messy and likes to party.”
SOCIOPATH: Description of Donald Trump that came back to bite Foreign Secretary David Lammy. What he actually meant was “wise and handsome statesman.”
PADDLEBOARDING: Not to be confused with waterboarding, Liberal Democrat Leader Ed Davey made a splash with a host of creative election campaign stunts. This briefly spared picture editors from having to use yet another boring snap of Keir Starmer in a hard hat.
HORIZON: In which an ITV drama forced Westminster to pay attention to a massive, long-running Post Office scandal. The system working as it should.
SANDWICH: Tory Leader Kemi Badenoch likes a fight … but not sandwiches. Sunak’s replacement said the bread-based fave was not “a real food” and declared “lunch is for wimps.” Cancel British politics, please.
CHANGE: Labour opted for brevity over detail in its single-word campaign pitch this year. Fortunately its plan for government after a landslide victory was fully fleshed-out and definitely existed.
AIR MILES: How to spend as much time out of a country that’s fallen out of love with you as possible? Jump on a plane. Starmer has already made 16 international trips in less than six months in the job.
SAUSAGES: The PM made a dent on the world stage as he accidentally used his biggest speech yet to call for “the return of the sausages” from Gaza. Tough crowd!
OPERATION EARLY DAWN: A bold plan to win over skeptical Brits by releasing offenders from jail early. Labour blamed the Tories for mismanaging prisons for years, while hardened crims popped champagne corks and vowed to vote for Starmer forevermore.
D-DAY: The somber commemorations for which are apparently a great time to sneak off and do a TV interview in which you moan about growing up without satellite TV.
DEFECTION: Conservative MPs facing defeat suddenly realized they loved high-tax, high-spending Starmer after all.
BUTE HOUSE AGREEMENT: In some expert 4D chess, Scottish First Minister Humza Yousaf boldly ripped up this arrangement with the Scottish Greens, masterfully ending his own career. Don’t hate the player, hate the game.
SUE: Gray, the all-powerful, all-knowing chief of staff who needed only a first name and would 100 percent guarantee that Labour dominated in government.
MORGAN: McSweeney, the replacement all-powerful, all-knowing chief of staff who needs only a first name and will 100 percent let Labour dominate in government. Honest.
Dan Bloom, Noah Keate, Bethany Dawson and Andrew McDonald contributed.
The post 37 words that sum up a wild 2024 in British politics appeared first on Politico.
