The tradition of holiday tips to thank service workers endures, even as Americans have gotten tired of the regular requests for tips the rest of the year.
More people said they planned to tip workers like housekeepers, child care providers and trash collectors at the holidays this year than in previous years, according to a survey published this week by the financial website Bankrate, which began polling in 2021. A significant majority of those surveyed said they tipped “to say thank you.”
“Holiday tipping has held its own,” said Ted Rossman, a senior industry analyst at the site, even though the typical amounts people expected to give were mostly flat with previous years. (The online survey of about 2,400 adults was conducted in late October and early November.)
The subject of tipping has become more fraught in recent years. Surveys show that consumers are confused and frustrated with tipping expectations generally. That’s particularly true for the suggested amounts on payment screens that confront patrons of coffee shops, delivery services, food trucks and ride sharing companies. The Pew Research Center published a survey last year in which most Americans said that tipping was expected in more places than it was five years earlier. And a separate Bankrate survey last summer found that a third of those responding considered tipping culture in the United States to be “out of control.”
Yet misgivings about tipping apparently carry an asterisk when it comes to the December holidays. “A lot of people are fed up with tipping, but it does seem the holidays are a special case,” Mr. Rossman said.
Academic research backs that up — at least, when it comes to tipping in sit-down restaurants. Sit-down meals are one area where there is some agreement, the Pew survey found. More than nine of 10 respondents said they “often” or “always” left a tip in that setting.
A study published in September in the International Journal of Hospitality Management analyzed credit card data on millions of guest checks at sit-down restaurants across the country. Researchers found that tipping was significantly higher at restaurant outings during religious and other “family-oriented” holidays, like Christmas, perhaps because the gatherings reinforce a sense of belonging and strengthen “prosocial” behavior — that is, behavior meant to help other people.
Adam Eric Greenberg, an assistant professor of marketing at Bocconi University in Milan, who has studied tipping behavior, said his research found that people tip significantly more during the holiday period — by about 3 to 4 percent — compared with the rest of the year. In his study, he analyzed two years of tipping data at a busy restaurant in upstate New York and found that people who usually don’t tip much year-round tended to tip more around the holidays, while already generous tippers tipped even more. “There’s a feeling of, ‘Maybe this person needs it more now,’” Dr. Greenberg said.
In the United States, he said, there’s already a cultural expectation about tipping when dining out and the context of the holiday season increases that feeling. (When his family visits him in Milan, he said, they are uncomfortable about not tipping, even though he reassures them it’s neither expected nor common in Italy.) “People generally want to feel more generous around the holidays,” he said. “There’s almost an expectation to give more.”
Lizzie Post, the great-great-granddaughter of the etiquette expert Emily Post and co-president of the Emily Post Institute, said tipping at the holidays is distinct from gratuities at other times of the year. “The holidays are different because we’re tipping a more personal group of people,” she said, like those who care regularly for your children, clean your home or walk your dog. (That’s not to say you can’t put an extra dollar or two in the tip jar at the coffee shop, if you’re feeling the spirit.) But holiday tipping, she said, is focused on recognizing workers with whom you have a deeper connection.
While you may tip some providers throughout the year — such as tipping your hairstylist at each visit — holiday tipping is a way to show gratitude for longer-term workers in a more formal way, she said. “It’s a recognition of a yearlong relationship with a service provider.”
Here are some questions and answers about holiday tipping:
How should I decide whom to tip, and how much should I tip them?
Fidelity Investments, in a 2024 tipping guide, suggests giving priority to those whose services you regularly use, those you have known the longest and those who have made the “biggest difference in your life lately.”
In Bankrate’s survey, respondents indicated they would typically be giving the following amounts this year: housekeeper, $50; child care provider, $50; landscaper or snow remover, $30; teacher, $25; mail carrier, $20; trash or recycling collector, $20.
Tip amounts vary by community and by your personal preference and budget. Ms. Post suggests the following guidelines (more details can be found on the institute’s website):
Nanny: Up to one week’s pay, and a gift from your child.
Housekeeper: Up to one week’s pay, or a small gift.
Pet groomer: Up to the cost of one session, or a gift.
Package deliverer: Small gift, up to $20. (Most delivery companies ban or discourage cash gifts.)
What if my budget is tight this year?
Tipping, even when expected, is ultimately voluntary. If you can’t afford to give everyone on your list a cash gift, Ms. Post said, consider making special cookies or candy to show your appreciation to those who deliver your newspaper, maintain your yard or collect your trash. (In some areas, trash collection is done by private contractors, rather than provided as a municipal service, so patrons may be familiar with the workers, she noted.)
Autumn Knutson, a certified financial planner in Tulsa, Okla., said showing appreciation is the goal. While cash will certainly be welcomed if you can afford it, “you can also give kindness,” she said, even if it’s simply a verbal acknowledgment of your appreciation. One option may be to offer an in-home service worker extra time off with pay rather than a holiday bonus. That way, you are showing you value them, but you aren’t paying more out of your budget than you normally would. If you’re unsure how that would be received, she said, inquire which they would prefer. “It’s not rude to ask,” she said.
Is it OK to tip with a digital payment app?
Ms. Post said she frowns on giving holiday tips via apps, like Venmo or Cash App. “I would say cash is king,” she said. From an etiquette standpoint, money — or perhaps a check — tucked inside a card with a short handwritten note shows your gratitude by making the presentation special, she said. It seems inappropriate to ask your longtime doorman, say, if you live in a city like New York, for his Venmo username, rather than personally handing him an envelope with the tip inside. “It comes from a place of goodness,” she said. “You want it to register.”
An exception, Ms. Knutson said, may be younger people, who are regular users of the apps and accustomed to being paid through them.
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