“This cannot be real life. It just can’t,” said an animated and live Jon Stewart on The Daily Show.
The Comedy Central show was airing live after the Presidential Debate between President Biden and former President Trump, and Stewart didn’t hold back his disappointment about the evening.
“We just watched what you watched,” he said at the top of the show.
“Let me just say after watching tonight’s debate, both of these men should be using performance enhancing drugs. As much of it as they can get. If performance enhancing drugs will improve their lucidity, their ability to solve problems, and in one of the candidate’s cases, improve their truthfulness, morality and malignant narcissism, then suppository away. They should take whatever magical drugs can kick their brains into gear, because this ain’t Olympic swimming,” he added.
Stewart summed up a debate that saw Biden stutter and suffer through dense policy talk and Trump lie, albeit in a more cogent way.
“Anybody can fuck up talking,” Stewart said of Biden’s Medicare fluff. “I’m sure it’s not something that, repeated throughout the debate, is causing Democrats across the country to either jump out of windows or vomit silently into the nearest recycling bin.”
Biden’s silence wasn’t any better, according to the comedian. “A lot of people have resting 25th amendment face,” he added.
“So, Biden, perhaps, not on top of his game. Maybe I will check out this young upstart Donald Trump,” he said. “He does not appear to have passed the asshole test.”
Stewart joked about Trump’s false claim that he did not sleep with porn star Stormy Daniels. “She was a porn character actor at best,” joked Stewart.
The Daily Show host also took aim at CNN, which refused to fact check either man live, and give them only two minutes per answer. “Who came up with these dumbass fucking rules and why would any of these people agree to them?,” he asked.
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— The Daily Show (@TheDailyShow) June 28, 2024
The post Jon Stewart Jokes Biden & Trump Should Take Performance-Enhancing Drugs To Improve Their “Lucidity” & “Malignant Narcissism” After Debate appeared first on Deadline.
