Everyone wants—and deserves—to feel like a main character in their own life, especially when it comes to dating. Going into 2026, “Main Character Energy Dating”—which basically means dating someone who makes you feel important; what a concept!—is set to take the scene by storm.
“Gen Z has worked out that the right person isn’t necessarily the most conventionally attractive or successful,” says Julia Stein, a Berlin-based sex consultant and relationship advisor at Drachen Toys. “They want someone who makes them feel seen, valued, and energized rather than anxious or small.”
Here’s what main character energy dating looks like in action.
What Is Main Character Energy in Dating?
Main character energy dating basically involves dating someone who makes you feel like your truest self. You don’t have to put up a front or simply play a supporting role in their life. Rather, you both love and value each other for your authenticity.
“Think about how you feel after spending time with someone: Do you feel more confident? More like yourself? Or do you feel drained, anxious, or like you’re playing a role?” Stein asks. “A partner with Main Character Energy respects your individuality. They don’t need you to shrink or change to make them comfortable. They create space for both of you to grow.”
While main character energy might sound a bit… narcissistic, it’s quite the opposite. In fact, this type of dating involves emotionally aligning with your partner, so you both feel equally important.
“Both people should feel central in the relationship,” Stein notes. “When someone has genuine Main Character Energy, they make you feel important while also feeling valued themselves. Nobody gets sidelined.”
Rather than competing with your partner (we’ve all witnessed relationships like this), you celebrate each other’s wins, knowing they aren’t threats to your own.
“Previous generations often stayed in relationships that made them feel small because they thought that was normal,” says Julia. “Gen Z refuses to accept that as the standard.”
4 Rules for ‘Main Character Energy Dating’
According to Stein, there are a few important rules to “main character energy dating.”
Prioritize a Regulated Nervous System
Your nervous system will tell you how safe you feel with your partner. Of course, if you have a history of trauma or anxiety, you might be sensitive to triggers unrelated to your partner’s true character. However, it’s important to date someone willing to help you heal and provide a supportive space to do so.
“Choose someone who regulates your nervous system,” Stein says. “If you feel calm and grounded around them rather than on edge, that’s a good sign. Assess whether you feel more like yourself in their presence or if you’re constantly performing.”
Avoid Chaos
Drama is a massive red flag in dating—and one that will surely steer your plot down a darker path.
“Avoid partners who drain your storyline with chaos,” says Stein. “Some people thrive on drama, and while that might feel exciting initially, it exhausts you over time. Look for consistency rather than intensity.”
Look Out For Accountability
No one is perfect, and you can learn a lot about a person by how well they’re willing to take accountability for their past.
“Pay attention to how they speak about their exes and friends. Someone who constantly blames others or speaks negatively about everyone in their life will eventually treat you the same way,” says Stein. “Choose people who take accountability and show respect even when relationships end.”
Trust Your Intuition
Never underestimate the power and accuracy of your intuition.
“Trust your body’s response,” Stein recommends. “If something feels off, even when everything looks perfect on paper, listen to that instinct. Your body often recognizes incompatibility before your mind catches up.”
The post 4 Tips for Dating With ‘Main Character Energy’ appeared first on VICE.
