Donald Trump wants to crush The Swamp. The leaks, the sneaks, and the secrets are all there. Our writers, David Gardner, Farrah Tomazin, and Sarah Ewall-Wice, are sifting through the ooze so you don’t have to. Don’t miss out.
In this week… Marla Maples, Fancy James, Alexis Wilkins, James Braid, Alan Garten, Kimberly Guilfoyle, Ben Black, Stephanie Grisham, Kash Patel, Anna Delvey, Tom Homan and (obviously) Jeffrey Epstein.
Like her father, Susie Wiles, 68 is the power in the stands, calling the big plays.
Susie’s dad, Pat Summerall, the former NFL kicker turned iconic broadcaster, was the steady, familiar voice of Sunday-night football for decades, delivering 16 Super Bowls and a generation of games to millions of Americans.
But now little Susie, Donald Trump’s chief of staff, finds herself the old dear in the headlines following her indiscreet Vanity Fair interview published on Tuesday. And the Swamp has learned that may just be the beginning of the Wiley political strategist’s troubles.
In the late 1970s, Wiles cut her political teeth as an assistant to Summerall’s old teammate on the New York Giants, US Congressman Jack Kemp. She would later spend years lurking in the background of Republican politics—from the scheduling office of Ronald Reagan and as Florida Governor Ron DeSantis’ political adviser—mirroring her dad’s game day tactics: read the field, stay cool under pressure, steer the team through looming chaos.
Yet for all her pedigree, Wiles’ polished narrative has hit a snag in recent weeks thanks to her past as a lobbyist for big money interests, which is fueling distrust among Trump’s base.
Filings show that between November 2017 and at least April 2024, Wiles was registered to lobby the federal government on behalf of at least 42 different clients, through her first firm Ballard Partners and later with Mercury Public Affairs.
Among her more controversial clients was a waste-management company that resisted cleaning up a radioactive landfill; a Canada-linked mining company pushing to dig a massive mine in a pristine wilderness; and a tobacco company fighting FDA regulation of flavored cigars.
Some have also pointed to Wiles’ work for Mercury, which counts Pfizer, a vaccine developer, among its clients, as proof that she doesn’t buy into Trump’s Make America Healthy Again agenda.
“They didn’t want the status quo changed, and they’ve jumped into bed with Big Pharma,” former Department of Health employee Steve Hatfill said in a recent interview.
Others have blamed her for the president’s missteps on everything from his affordability is “a hoax” stance to his America First agenda.
“You can’t have Swampy Susie running the White House!” far right conspiracy theorist Alex Jones lamented on X, echoing the gripes of many others in the MAGA movement.
Wiles may be the daughter of football royalty and “the most powerful woman in Washington,” according to Trump, but for some of his supporters, she represents the kind of establishment connection they loathe.
She is the first female POTUS chief of staff, a badge of honor. But it could yet spell her downfall as she’s not in the White House Boys Club. In sporting parlance, the question now is whether she survives the final drive—or ends up benched by her own side.
Her team rallied around her after the Vanity Fair debacle. But suspicious MAGA loyalists may yet decide Swampy Susie’s fate.
“Chief of Staff Susie Wiles has helped President Trump achieve the most successful first 11 months in office of any President in American history. President Trump has no greater or more loyal advisor than Susie. The entire Administration is grateful for her steady leadership and united fully behind her.” White House Press Secretary Karoline Leavitt told The Swamp.
The (Other) First Lady
She has been ever-present at Mar-a-Lago during the run-up to the festive season and was turning heads at the White House Christmas Party on Monday night. No, not Melania, silly. Newly minted grandmother Marla Maples may have missed out on the big job as Trump’s current wife, but she is making a fine case that she would have made a better first lady. At least she turns up.
Betting on the Biggest Loser
The race to the bottom in Donald Trump’s Cabinet is heating up, with White House insiders putting all their money on the one secretary who vanished from sight this week.
Kash Patel did his Keystone best to be the first booted from the kiddies table with yet another humiliating mishap with the entire world watching. Surely it’s time for the president to put him on the permanent naughty step after he boasted about the FBI catching the Brown University shooter, only for the innocent bystander to be freed a few hours later. If you recall, the same thing happened after the Charlie Kirk shooting. And that case got solved, not thanks to the FBI, but because the shooter’s parents turned him in.
Astonishingly, Patel is still running the FBI as of now.There’s actually better odds on Polymarket of him getting engaged by the end of the year—6 percent— than there is for him being Kashed in—2 percent. He’d better hope his country star girlfriend Alexis Wilkins doesn’t drop him when the fed jets are in the slipstream, and she’s back on the bus.
As for Pete Hegseth, he was in the Oval Office on Monday, giving away made-up medals to servicemen for working on the Mexican border. The president affectionately called him “Pete,” so he may last a little longer. It can’t hurt that he just killed another eight alleged drug dealers at sea.
Pam Bondi was there, too, and got a brief name check from Trump despite MAGA growing increasingly testy about her failure to bring any prosecutions that stick. Bondi may not have the best handle on the law, but she is truly gifted when it comes to sucking-up to the boss. Even though Susie Wiles isn’t a Bondi fan, the AG is working hard to defend the president. We’ll see just how far she’ll go when the Epstein files are released later this week, per an act of Congress.
Noticeably missing from the Oval was Department of Homeland Security Kristi Noem, the Cabinet member directly responsible for U.S. border security. She has been keeping a low profile since being humiliated on the Hill during her appearance before the House Homeland Security Committee last Thursday. Several Democratic lawmakers demanded her extension-laden head. We are hearing they may get it.
A major clue that Noem will be the first Cabinet secretary to fall on her ICE pick came from an unlikely source: Tom Homan.
Trump’s Shrek-like enforcer couldn’t be more different from Noem—he even looks bad cosplaying a man in a suit—but he’s not subtle. So the fact that he was called up to talk at the fake medal ceremony and thanked Trump (multiple times) and paid a fawning tribute to Stephen Miller—but did not mention Noem spoke volumes.
Homan the Terrible said how much he enjoyed working with Miller, but sources tell The Swamp he loathes Noem even though the border czar and the DHS Secretary share responsibilities for hunting down the non-existent illegal aliens that aren’t trying to get into the country.
If you don’t believe The Swamp, check out Polymarket. Noem is the 24 percent favorite to get the chop, with Hegseth second at 18 percent. It probably doesn’t help that search trends show people are trying to find a “Kristi Gnome.” Now there’s a cosplay we would like to see. Better searching under “ICE Barbie.”
But odds can change very quickly, as can life in the White House. Susie Wiles was in with a bullet today, up to 4th place with 8 percent.
The First (Aid) Lady
Seven years ago, Melania Trump was famously recorded saying: “Who gives a f— about the Christmas stuff and decorations?” and apparently she’s upset that the media hasn’t forgotten she trashed Santa. Now her former chief of staff Stephanie Grisham insists Melania “loves the holidays” and is “not a grinch.” So gossips suggesting the first lady had anything to do with the broken White House nativity set that has been sent off for repair should go straight on the naughty list.
Trump’s Black Mark on Epstein
As Democrats on the House Oversight Committee rolled out a fresh tranche of damning photos documenting Jeffrey Epstein’s social and financial networks last Friday, Donald Trump was hosting a swearing-in ceremony in the Oval Office for Ben Black, his hand-picked choice to run the U.S. International Development Finance Corporation. The timing was uncanny. After all, Black isn’t just another private-equity scion parachuted into a senior government role. He is the son of former Apollo Global Management founder and Trump ally Leon Black, an Epstein associate who has been dodgy about his business dealings with the late sex trafficker To quote Tina Brown’s recent newsletter Fresh Hell: “Wake me up when there’s a concrete answer to what else billionaire Leon Black got for the $170 million he paid Epstein for “tax advice.” While Black père has denied knowing anything about Epstein’s industrial-scale sex trafficking, a 2023 settlement with the U.S. Virgin Islands attorney general shows Black admitted that the money he paid Epstein was used, in part, to “fund [Epstein’s] operations.” The document also shows that Black agreed to pay $62.5 million to the U.S. Virgin Islands in 2023 to be released from any potential claims arising out of the territory’s three-year investigation into those same“operations.” Now Black fils has been ushered into a powerful appointment by a president whose own history with Epstein continues to dog him. The Development Finance Corporation controls tens of billions of dollars in U.S. development capital, which means Ben Black bagged a plum job that sits at the intersection of global finance, geopolitics and private equity. But at a moment when Congress is demanding accountability for Epstein’s financial networks, Trump’s decision to spotlight a Black in the Oval Office looks less like a coincidence—and more like his latest reminder that, for the president, the Epstein era never really ended.
Trump’s Party Favors and Fall Guys
Donald Trump arrived at the White House staff Christmas party on Sunday (there have been many!) to pay tribute to his hardworking aides, but delivered something closer to a roast, improvised in real time. In a meandering 40-minute speech, Trump kicked off by admitting he once thought his deputy chief of staff James Blair was too quiet to be any good. “I’d hear from other people he’s a total political genius, but I didn’t see it,” Trump said, wondering aloud if Blair, 36, had simply been “intimidated by the Office of the President.” The praise, such as it was, landed only after the public confession of doubt. “They said, ‘He’s not quiet, sir. Maybe he’s quiet around you,” Trump recalled. “That was two years ago. And you know what? He’s not quiet; he’s incredible.”
Fellow deputy chief of staff Dan Scavino, meanwhile, was introduced as “the most powerful man in the administration,” a line that a line that likely hurt Petey Hegseth’s feelings. Legislative Affairs staffer James Braid got the full Trump treatment—less résumé, more measurements. “Big James is like 6’7” and he weighs like 320,” Trump announced much to Braid’s embarrassment. Big, the president clarified compared to “almost anybody.” Then came the holiday nightmare story about White House medical director James Jones, trailing “two young ladies who I’ll bet are very nice” on a trip to Peru, only to be bitten by a viper. “This is a terrible Christmas story,” Trump acknowledged, but not before savoring every bizarre detail. Trump also paused to ask Trump Organization general counsel Alan Garten whether he was winning or losing in court. The verdict? “I guess we are winning because we are here,” Trump reasoned, before admitting he rarely sticks to prepared remarks, despite “really great speeches” written by his speech writer Ross Worthington. In the end, it was the most on-brand gift of all: a reminder that in Trumpworld, the script is optional, and self-centered praise is inevitable. “Everybody wants to come to the Christmas party—I have made so many enemies because you can only have so many,” Trump said as he wrapped up, declaring that for every one person who gets into his parties, 10 are left out. “This is not a good thing, but you’re here, and the food is phenomenal. Go eat… We’re gonna have a great year.”
Fancy Kimberly Engaging in Greece
Donald Trump’s surprise move to send Kimberly Guilfoyle as far as possible from Palm Beach so his son could court Bettina Anderson without looking over his shoulder for his old flame has clearly paid off. This weekend, we learned that Don Jr. popped the question to Bettina and even he seemed surprised that she said, yes.
Meanwhile, Kimberly is making a splash as U.S. Ambassador with the help of flamboyant fashion guru Fancy James. He calls her “Kimmie.” What better backdrop than the U.S. Embassy in Athens to look fabulous on social media and the covers of Greek magazines?
From Prison to the Party
It’s not clear what disgraced former Rep. George Santos’ day job has been since his presidential pardon, but he’s been turning his infamy into a hosting gig on the party circuit. The ex-New York congressman and convicted fraudster held a “Santos Claus” Christmas party in Washington, D.C. sponsored by the far-right Gateway Pundit and others. Attendees included Rep. Marjorie Taylor Greene and Anna Paulina Luna, White House Chief of Protocol Monica Crowley, as well as a host of conservative media members. They got to rub shoulders with bonus convicts like Anna Delvey and Martin Shkreli. Next up: Santos has been promoting his “Good Riddance 2025” New Year’s countdown in New York City. Good riddance? Seems impossible to get rid of him.
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