So I interviewed tree-seller George Smith. I asked why this is such a cutthroat business.
Smith: Cutthroats years ago thought they owned those locations, so you now can’t put one stand near another. I’m from Brooklyn. Learned the old-fashioned way. At 12, I was a tie boy. Tying trees onto cars. Now I’m in the fields, pick my own trees, watch them grow. I shear them in Canada and North Carolina.
“Saying ‘a tree is a tree’ is like saying ‘sneakers are sneakers.’ There are different types, grades. Frasers last longer. Some customers leave theirs up till Valentine’s Day and put hearts on it. They’re cheapos. Also, make sure your tree guy cuts the stump, put it on your radiator so your house smells of Christmas. You know, there’s nothing like Christmas, especially in New York.”
Me: “What’s the best sort of Christmas tree?”
“I prefer a Fraser, but I used to like the balsam. They drop their needles more. That’s why I say you should get a Fraser. Fraser needles shed less. Last longer in the house. A tree doesn’t start dying until it hits the heat in your house.
“I sold one to President George W. Bush for his daughter Jenna. Delivered it myself, and President Bush is on the couch. I sold to Edie Falco, Jimmy Fallon. Some chisel. Bush’s daughter tried to chew me down the most. And we’d given her a bargain. It takes to get a 7-foot tree, eight years.
“We’re on 23rd and Second Avenue. I sold a 15-foot yesterday in Gramercy Park. $950, 15 feet. Took it on a sleigh. We got Santa to take it there. Then give it something to drink. Room-temperature water. Don’t make it hot. And you’d be good to go.
“Manhattan elevators are small. Yesterday, we had to cut one down in the hallway. They wanted a 12-footer, and the elevator could only fit 11 ¹/₂. We had to cut it.”
Me: “How much are your trees? How about if I get one? If you are going to schlep an 8- or 9-foot tree through my silk living room, I am gonna smack you in the head.”
Smith: “Kiss me at the end because it’d be perfect.”
Me: “Can I get a crappy tree up in my elevator to my apartment?”
Smith: “We have a white glove service. Let me come to your house. I’ll bring the tree myself.”
Problem with a tree-seller is, if you don’t like his gift — how can you exchange it?
Only in New York, kids, only in New York.
———————————————————————————————————–
H’wood’s 2026 not crystal clear
What a psychic does when not psyching, who knows — but here’s psychic John Cohan’s 2026 predictions:
The newest sandwich is Keith Urban and J.Lo. Me: Forget that. They may get closer than peanut butter on a bagel. But her history is using gents going back to the great grandpa of the original caveman.
Prince Harry and MeMe Meghan separate but keep it secret. Oh, please. What took Marry Harry so long? Not because the former ex previous prior onetime nonroyal HRH was busy working. I mean, obviously. His former princeship may claw out of there faster than he can room in bad Prince Andrew’s new hovel.
Harry waits until spring. Meghan starts her own fashion thing. She’s already tried acting, dating, fighting, marrying, divorcing, posing, TV’ing, writing, photographing, cooking, manufacturing, interviewing, selling and claiming photographers are chasing her when they’re actually asleep.
Kristen Bell runs hot with a new movie, “Diane Ladd Life Story.”
Justin Bieber moves to another country. OK.
Lori Loughlin’s career is back on track, but there’s a low after her slpit from mate Mossimo Giannulli.
Ryan Seacrest’s health makes him leave “Wheel of Fortune.” Health improves.
Reba McEntire. Maybe getting married. Again.
The post Christmas tree-seller explains why it’s such a cutthroat business appeared first on New York Post.
