The arrival of No Nut November means but one thing: Thou shalt not wank! During this joyous month, “happy endings” are forbidden. Onanistic pleasures and skirt-chasing alike are to be replaced by more righteous pursuits. I have observed a growing number of exemplary young and fit men advocating against masturbation and pornography, which should be an encouraging sign for those wishing to kick the habits.
The NY Post reports, “According to creators, when unused sperm naturally breaks down and reabsorbs into the body, it recycles a host of physical and cognitive benefits — from a permanent testosterone boost and boundless energy to razor-sharp mental clarity and iron-clad self-discipline.” The Post, however, doesn’t see any special rewards to be reaped from allowing the body to reabsorb unused sperm; it won’t turn you into a superman, they conclude.
No Nut November Promises Some Pretty Wild Health Benefits. But Are Any of Them Real?
While longer periods of abstinence may increase your sperm count, it apparently does not improve sperm quality. Dr. Akash Kapadia of Georgia Urology told The Post, “Semen or sperm retention has not been shown to offer a benefit in vitality, sustained testosterone levels, or potency.”
Yet, Dr. Kapadia clarified that he’s not aware of any evidence demonstrating that No Nut November could be a potentially harmful ritual. He says, “The male reproductive system doesn’t just shut down when a man stops ejaculating. It continues functioning normally, with no dangerous accumulation of sperm, semen or pressure.”
While The Post pointed out that research has linked frequent ejaculation to a lower risk of prostate cancer, Dr. Kapadia emphasized that the findings only show an association, not that ejaculating directly prevents illness. Granted, follow-up research seemed to lend weight to the theory that ejaculation can help rid the prostate gland of harmful substances.
The idea of holding onto one’s seeds might sound like a modern, nutty one to some, but is, in fact, a rather old one that can be found across cultures. For example, the goal of the Daoist practice huanjing bunao is to allow unejaculated semen to nourish the body. It is, of course, important to consider the larger issue of morality, no matter how antiquated it may seem.
Only a Wanker Would Object to the noble Spirit of No Nut November
Those claiming that refraining from masturbation has helped boost energy levels and mental clarity probably aren’t full of bollocks. Masturbation can obviously turn into an addiction, wreaking havoc upon the mind and more. Masturbation is accompanied by the release of dopamine, which may lead to a crash afterward. Most reasonable beings can agree that it’s best if individuals learn to seek dopamine rewards through productive activities, as opposed to falling into the trap of laziness. Verily, one could argue that No Nut November presents a fantastic opportunity to retrain the mind, put the naughty mags down, and stop objectifying women and other beings.
Friendly advice: If you are struggling with lust, you can always throw yourself into thorns like Saint Benedict of Nursia and Saint Francis of Assisi. Saint Francis used snow as another effective boner-killer. Within the Catholic community, influencers like Cameron Riecker are working to lend support and a sense of community to struggling brothers.
And here’s a reminder: If you dare ridicule anyone participating in No Nut November, you will thus be exposing yourself as a slimy wanker.
The post This Is What ‘No Nut November’ Really Does to Your Body, According to a Urologist appeared first on VICE.
