When my 107-year-old grandmothercasually mentioned that she doesn’t like getting in and out of cars, I realized I knew the perfect place for my wedding: her retirement community.
I didn’t grow up in, and don’t currently live in, the same place as most of my family, including my grandma. So when I started thinking about wedding venues, I was drawing a blank. Then I realized that the location that would be easiest for everyone was the retirement community I’ve visited more than 100 times since I was little.
The venue has a pond, beautifully landscaped grounds, and plenty of space. All things many people would look for in a wedding venue. But for me, the best part is knowing that the most important guest will be most likely to show up: my grandma.
It’s not a traditional wedding venue, but it has everything I want
Maybe you’re picturing a gray, sterile environment. This place is far from that.
While the community my grandmother lives in may not look like a traditional wedding venue, and there is always a puzzle being put together somewhere, it does have a lot to offer. There’s a pond surrounded by flowers, multiple rooms to reserve, and ample parking.
There’s also the benefit of my grandma being able to get from her apartment to the ceremony in just five minutes.
My whole family already knows the location, because they visit regularly. I also have fond memories of the place: the juniper trees out front, taking long walks around the pond, spotting swans and bunnies nearby, and, of course, sitting in my grandma’s apartment. It’s a place that’s already special to me.
I know choosing an untraditional location that has probably never hosted a wedding could be risky, but it helps that the wedding will be small and I have so many relatives who live nearby to help.
When I proposed the idea to my partner, he immediately said yes. He had visited the location many times and thought it was a great idea. He also liked that we didn’t have to search very much to find our venue.
Other aspects will be unconventional, too
The decision to host my wedding at this unique location has made me rethink what we’re actually trying to accomplish with a wedding. Rather than choosing a venue based on what looks impressive in photos or what couples are “supposed” to do, my fiancé and I are choosing a place based on the people we most want there.
The rest of our weddingwill be equally untraditional: pies instead of cake, I won’t be wearing white, and many of the most common wedding rituals won’t be part of the day.
Thankfully, my family is on board. Nobody objects to me saying my vows at a senior living community. They all know how much my grandma means to me, and it’s a family value to be practical and think about others.
The decision is also partially selfish. Not having to look at other venues helps combat decision fatigue, and this location ticks all the boxes I wanted. I wanted a space with lots of nature nearby and something close to the catering company I am working with. I don’t see this as a compromise or settling in any way.
The wedding is coming up next summer; it’s planned for my grandma’s birthday, which just happens to fall on a Saturday that works with our schedule.
We won’t be allowed to have loud music, alcohol, or fireworks because of the location, but I wouldn’t have wanted those things at another venue either. I want the day I get married to be low-stress, with my partner and me surrounded by nature and the people we love most.
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