This story is based on an interview with Kaitlin Manns, 33, a home health aide and server from Granite City, Illinois. It has been edited for length and clarity.
My grandpa employed a carer before he died at 76. And my grandma, 76, mom, and stepdad, both 56 — all of whom have chronic medical conditions — had them, too.
They were wonderful, but they ended up leaving for better-paid jobs. I didn’t blame them, but it left our family struggling to find cover.
So I decided to step in and do the job myself. It made sense because I’ve got a nurturing personality, and it felt like the right thing to do.
I work 2 jobs
I qualified as a home health aide, a role that still requires monthly virtual training, and combined it with working as a server at a restaurant on weekends.
My days are pretty hectic, particularly because I have six kids aged between 2 and 13. Two of my siblings — both 9 — also live in my five-bedroom house, along with Mom and my stepdad.
Grandma lives in her own home, about a 15-minute drive away.
Thankfully, my husband, Justice, 28, is wonderful and really helps out. Still, he works mornings at a furniture rental company, so he’s busy, too.
Our schedule begins with him walking the oldest child two blocks to the school bus around 6:45 a.m. The others leave for their school, and I drop off Justice at his job.
The state pays my salary
Then I drive to the toddlers’ day care before starting my caregiving around 9:30 a.m. I look after the three adults at separate times, helping them with things like showering, laundry, and doctors’ appointments.
On Mondays, I’ll take care of Grandma and my stepdad. Tuesdays, it’s my mom and stepdad. Wednesday is only my stepdad, Thursday is my grandma again, and I work for Mom on Friday morning.
I usually put in 38 hours a week, earning $18.50 an hour, which is paid for by the state.
On weekends, I work at least 23 hours as a server at a bar and grill, earning $7.50 an hour. But my pay is mostly tips. I can earn as much as $300 per shift.
I love the job because it’s a Mom-and-Pop business, and everybody knows each other. It’s like being with friends.
People often ask me how I manage to do it all. It’s challenging at times, particularly because my grandma and stepdad have mobility and memory issues.
I have little time to myself
There’s a lot of paperwork, too, such as getting Grandma approved for a scooter and a ramp.
It takes a mixture of patience and organizational skills. It’s very rewarding because I get to be with my loved ones all day.
My job as a carer, big sister, and mom, plus the server work, leaves me little time for myself. However, I enjoy movies and reading on my Kindle before bed.
I rest easy knowing I’m doing my very best for everyone. I’m paying my folks back for raising me while giving my kids a similar, loving childhood.
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