The sibling experience is varied, layered, and nuanced. No one has ever had the exact same sibling relationship since the concept of siblings was invented. These are great examples of various sibling dynamics presented in pop song format, but there’s no way we could find a song for every single sibling experience and keep this list under 1,000 words.
In the meantime, here are four songs that represent a decent chunk of the sibling dynamic spectrum.
“Shadow” by Ashlee Simpson
Ashlee Simpson released her debut album Autobiography in 2004, which featured the vulnerable pop song “Shadow”. The lyrics were inspired by Ashlee’s experience living in the shadow of her older sister, Jessica Simpson, who, by the mid-2000s, was a household name in pop culture. This song was Ashlee’s way of confronting the struggle to find her own identity.
On the spectrum of sibling experiences, “Shadow” represents those who are constantly compared to a successful or responsible older sibling, and are struggling to prove that they can be their own person.
“Brother” by Amy Winehouse
“Brother” is one of Amy Winehouse’s deepest cuts, released as a hidden track on her 2003 album Frank. It’s the first of two songs hidden on the final track, “Amy Amy Amy”. Here, Winehouse leaves a tough-love message for her older brother, Alex. She urges him to take responsibility and care for their ailing mother. Basically, she tells him that “your priority, it must be her.”
Winehouse attempts to soften the request by saying “How do I find words that do not condescend.” As his younger sister, she’s trying to give him a reality check without talking down to him. Which, as anyone with siblings knows, is easier said than done. “Brother” represents a contrasting sibling dynamic. There’s the hardship of eldest child responsibility. But also the struggle of trying to push a reluctant sibling to do the right thing.
“Alfie” by Lily Allen
Lily Allen’s ode to her younger brother, the titular Alfie, appeared on her debut album, Alright, Still, in 2006. The lyrics out of context seem like a mean-spirited dig at her lazy, stoner brother. Which is actually how Alfie Allen interpreted the song at first. But Lily Allen explained that it was her way of showing her little brother how much she cared.
“At first he was really upset about it, because he thought that I was just pointing out all of his bad points and attacking him,” she told Pitchfork in 2006. “I thought he’d be really, really happy because it proved to him how much I loved him, that I care about him, and I want him to do something with his life.” On the sibling spectrum, “Alfie” is a good representation of well-meaning attempts to motivate your sibling that get wildly misinterpreted and cause a huge fight.
“Grace” by Florence and The Machine
This track appeared on Florence and the Machine’s 2018 album High as Hope. At the time, Florence Welch said that her younger sister, Grace, was annoyed at her for this song. Despite the fact that it’s a beautiful ode to a devoted sister, putting her love into a pop song instead of saying it face-to-face was apparently a very “English” thing to do. But Florence also admitted that their family is “riddled with intimacy issues.” So saying “I love you” point-blank is difficult.
“I have huge feelings for [Grace],” Florence told The Times in 2018. “She’s such an important person in my life, but there’s no way we could sit down in front of each other and go ‘I love you so much’.” For those siblings who struggle to express how much they mean to each other, just put “Grace” on the stereo and listen closely.
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The post The Entire Emotional Spectrum of Having a Sibling Can Be Explained in Just 4 Pop Songs appeared first on VICE.
