If you’re in the dating world and actively on social media, you’ve likely heard of “roster dating,” which essentially involves keeping a “roster” of potential suitors while figuring out which one might become the MVP. Of course, some daters choose to continue playing the field and enjoying their options for as long as possible.
While the dating trend can definitely keep things light and casual, ensuring you’re not putting all your eggs in one basket too soon, is it really the healthiest approach to dating? Let’s dive in.
What Even Is ‘Roster Dating’?
According to Katie Dissanayake, sex and dating expert at HUD App, “Roster dating is when you’re casually dating multiple people at once, rather than committing to one person.”
“The name comes from sports: just as a team has a roster of players, you’re keeping a ‘roster’ of potential options while you get to know them,” she explains.
It’s similar to the idea of “playing the field,” where you’re getting to know various partners without the intention of committing to one person any time soon.
Pros of Roster Dating
Roster dating can be a fun, casual dating approach, so long as everyone is on the same page.
“One of the biggest pros of roster dating is that you can learn so much about yourself and your preferences,” says Dissanayake. “It can help you figure out your communication style, values, and the qualities you’re truly looking for in a partner. But ultimately and most importantly, it can be very fun!”
Many people enter the dating scene like it’s a battlefield, anxious to make one wrong move. Or, on the other hand, they might settle for the first person who doesn’t make their skin crawl. With roster dating, you take away the pressure of commitment or finding “the one.”
“Dating doesn’t have to be so serious, and keeping an open mind can keep it from becoming a chore,” Dissanayake says.
Cons of Roster Dating
Of course, there are some negative aspects of roster dating, especially if you’re seeking a more serious connection.
“The honest con is that it takes emotional energy,” says Dissanayake. “Roster dating works when you’re using it to explore what you want, not to avoid intimacy. It can be frustrating and draining if communication falls apart and people aren’t on the same page.”
Ultimately, if not approached with care, this dating trend can blur lines and lead to miscommunications.
“Roster dating can definitely become confusing when expectations don’t align, which is why it’s so important to show up to your dating life as openly and honestly as you can,” Dissanayake points out.
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