An Ashland, Virginia, liquor store expected a quiet weekend after the busy holiday. What they got instead was way weirder. A raccoon had fallen through the ceiling, raided the scotch, smashed a trail across the floor, and passed out in the bathroom.
The ABC store staff walked in Saturday morning to find broken whisky bottles pooled across the floor and one unconscious raccoon wedged between the toilet and the bin. According to AP News, the animal had slipped in during the holiday closure and made a beeline for the bottom shelf, where the scotch and whisky were kept. One ceiling tile didn’t survive the entry. Neither did several bottles.
Animal control officer Samantha Martin responded to what had become an unplanned detox situation. She told reporters she actually has a soft spot for raccoons and described this one as a particularly committed drinker. “He fell through one of the ceiling tiles and went on a full-blown rampage, drinking everything,” she said. Martin transported the animal to the Hanover County Animal Protection and Shelter, noting she laughed more than she probably should have during the ride.
Raccoon Breaks Into Liquor Store, Passes Out After Getting Wasted on Scotch
The shelter later confirmed the raccoon was both hammered and fine. In a statement reported across outlets, the agency said that after a few hours of sleep and no signs of injury “other than maybe a hangover and poor life choices,” the raccoon sobered up and was released back into the wild. They added that he had hopefully learned that breaking and entering is not the solution to any problem, including thirst.
The store thanked animal control for giving the raccoon what they jokingly called a “sober ride home.” Only one blurry security image exists, which means no one knows exactly how much alcohol the raccoon consumed or how long he partied before collapsing in the restroom. The evidence suggests it was enough to justify the nap.
This incident also taps into a bigger trend noted by wildlife researchers. Raccoons are adapting to human environments so successfully that some studies say they’re starting to show early signs of domestication. After watching one fall through a liquor store ceiling and drink the inventory, it’s hard not to see the argument.
The raccoon recovered. Hopefully, the little buddy’s hangover wasn’t too bad.
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