If you’re anything like me, you postpone a variety of tasks, from dreaded dentist appointments to intimidating book querying, telling yourself you’ll get to them “eventually.” This type of avoidance can be both addicting and enabling, holding you back from taking the necessary steps toward health, responsibility, and fulfillment.
Sometimes, all it takes is a community of procrastinators to come together and force each other to get s—t done—or, in other words, a “forcing party.”
What Is a Forcing Party?
X user Tyler Alterman coined the term “forcing party” back in July, likely without realizing how deeply it would resonate with his audience.
“Sometimes you need a coach or therapist, and sometimes you just need someone to invade your life and force [you] to book the doctor’s appointment, finish the writing assignment, submit the job application, etc.,” he wrote on X. “Does this sort of person exist for hire?”
One writer named Crystal Duan asked, “Can we do it for each other?”
Alterman responded with a concept we all can get behind: “I’m thinking of throwing a force-one-another-to-do-stuff party.”
Thus, the idea of a “forcing party” was born.
A forcing party is essentially an event where attendees compel each other to complete tasks they’ve been procrastinating on. You know, like the items on your to-do list you keep putting off, such as answering that pesky email, scheduling that dreaded appointment, paying that hefty medical bill, writing that lengthy article, creating that structured workout routine, etc.
We all know the relief that comes with checking off these to-dos. Still, bringing ourselves to actually do them can feel impossible, like we’re frozen and unable to find the motivation to follow through.
Sometimes, all we need is support from others—especially those in similar boats. If we can inspire and encourage others to get s—t done, then we can do so ourselves, too. Right?
How to Host a Forcing Party
If you like the idea of a forcing party and want to host your own, here are some tips for a successful event.
1. Make It Lighthearted
If you’re procrastinating a certain task, odds are it’s stirring up some negative emotions within you. Whether you’re dreading the boredom you’ll feel while writing a heavily researched essay or avoiding the high anxiety you’ll experience when scheduling that MRI your doctor ordered, you likely have good reason to avoid these tasks. However, life isn’t always sunshine and rainbows. Sometimes, we need to face our fears and work through discomfort.
Thankfully, by hosting a forcing party, you can cultivate a lighthearted experience for yourself in the process. Order your favorite takeout, cozy up your space, and purchase some “rewards” for when you’ve completed your postponed task. And, of course, make sure your support system is around you. This will alleviate the pressure you feel and provide resources should you need them.
2. Set a Time Limit
Rather than forcing yourself to start and complete your tasks within an unspecified period, merely set a time limit for getting them done. For example, let’s say you need to knock out a project for school. Instead of throwing a forcing party and telling yourself you’ll do the project “at some point” during the night, set a hard timeframe for yourself. That way, once you’ve reached the deadline, you know you’re free.
By allowing yourself to have an end time in mind—perhaps with a reward like dinner at your favorite restaurant—you likely won’t dread the activity nearly as much. Additionally, it helps everyone to complete their tasks during the same time frame, so you’re all putting your heads down to work, so to speak.
3. Create a ‘Ritual’
If you’ve been on TikTok at all recently, you’ve likely seen countless how-to videos about making your life more ~whimsical~. Creating rituals is a great way to transform stressful tasks into spiritual experiences.
For example, if your forcing party goal is to apply to a new job, create a ritual around that process. When writing your cover letter, visualize the hiring manager reading your words and connecting with them. When updating your resume, burn incense to calm your nerves and clear negative energy from old roles. As you hit “submit,” speak affirmations and burn an orange candle for career luck. These small rituals can make even the most mundane or overwhelming experience feel magical.
The post Can’t Stop Procrastinating? Try Going to a ‘Forcing Party’ appeared first on VICE.
