Welcome to Late Night Roundup, a rundown of the previous night’s highlights that lets you sleep — and lets us get paid to watch comedy. Here are the 50 best movies on Netflix right now.
Close Friends
President Trump returned from China last Friday after spending several days with China’s leader, Xi Jinping.
Jon Stewart addressed his viewers, asking if they felt safer now that “Daddy’s back home.”
“He was gone for a couple of days in China. We were scared: ‘Oh, where’s daddy? I’m so scared. Where’s daddy?’ But now he’s home, and I’m sure he brought us all the goodies from China.’” — JON STEWART
While President Trump said his meetings went well, there were few major deals announced during the visit.
“So, nothing? You got nothing! You flew to China, what is it, 400 million miles? I don’t know how far it is to China — far! You flew there to personally confront our rival superpower on the escalating trade and geopolitical tensions between us, and all you came back with was his Instagram? [imitating Trump] ‘The tariffs are in place, but we’re on the close friends story now. Well, he’s on mine.’” — JON STEWART
“He’s like a bull in a china shop. Or, obviously, as they call it over there, a shop.” — JON STEWART
The Punchiest Punchlines (Dad, You’re Embarrassing Us Edition)
“The president made a trip to China to see all of the factories where his America First merchandise is made. You got to check on the hats.” — JIMMY KIMMEL
“It seemed like he had fun. He eats this stuff up. The pageantry, whenever he visits a foreign land, it’s like a 5-year-old at their birthday party.” — JIMMY KIMMEL
“He’s so embarrassing on these trips. Give that man a parade, he’ll give you anything you want.” — JIMMY KIMMEL
The Bits Worth Watching
Stephen Colbert shared a never-before-seen sketch about a pigeon that looks like Michael Keaton on Monday’s special “The Worst of ‘The Late Show.’”
What We’re Excited About on Tuesday Night
Wanda Sykes will promote her new Netflix stand-up special on Tuesday’s “Jimmy Kimmel Live.”
Also, Check This Out
The Portland guitarist Marisa Anderson mined the scholar Harry Smith’s LP collection to record her takes on songs rooted in regions that the United States has been in conflict with since 1970.
The post Jon Stewart Asks What ‘Daddy’ Brought Back From China appeared first on New York Times.
