Welcome to Late Night Roundup, a rundown of the previous night’s highlights that lets you sleep — and lets us get paid to watch comedy. Here are the 50 best movies on Netflix right now.
He Has Risen
Early Easter Sunday, President Trump threatened Iran with attacks, in an expletive-filled social media post that ended with “Praise be to Allah.”
Stephen Colbert welcomed viewers to Monday’s “Late Show,” hoping that they had a great Easter, Passover, “or, like our president, went 100 percent cage-free crazy on the internet.”
“You know, it is not often that a network has to bleep the words of a sitting president.” — STEPHEN COLBERT
“I believe that’s a letter from Paul to the Corinthians.” — JIMMY KIMMEL
“[imitating Trump] Praise be to Allah. As we say every Easter, salam alaykum. It means no worries [singing] for the rest of your days.’” — STEPHEN COLBERT
“A few hours later, he put out an extra post, teasing some weeknight war crimes: ‘[imitating Trump] Tuesday, 8 p.m. Eastern time.’ OK, he could be announcing a military attack in prime time tomorrow, but he also might just be promoting ‘NCIS.’ 23 seasons of solving boat crime. This week a canoe strangled a drifter. CBS: seven more weeks until I don’t have to promote ‘NCIS.’ ” — STEPHEN COLBERT
“He’s the only president who teases a bombing the same way ABC promotes new episodes of ‘Will Trent.’” — JIMMY KIMMEL
The Punchiest Punchlines (Artemis II Edition)
“Now, everybody’s fine, but something else has gone wrong with the mission, because more than halfway to the moon, the Artemis II astronauts grappled with a toilet problem. Now, luckily, the astronauts had trained extensively on NASA’s broken-toilet simulator, a Greyhound bus.” — STEPHEN COLBERT
“The line to flush the pipe was blocked by ice. Not that I.C.E., just regular ice. They’re really — they’re out of control.” — JIMMY KIMMEL
“They’re hoping that the astronauts can befriend a cute stone alien to fix it like they did for Ryan Gosling. But, if not, they’ll either have to pee in bags or hold it until they get home, I guess.” — JIMMY KIMMEL
The Bits Worth Watching
Monday’s “Gutfeld” panel discussed the Easter message sent from the Artemis astronauts in outer space.
What We’re Excited About on Tuesday Night
The singer Brandi Carlile will sit down with Stephen Colbert ahead of a performance on Tuesday’s “Late Show.”
Also, Check This Out
A new sequel to “The Handmaid’s Tale,” “The Testaments,” focuses on a younger generation coming of age inside of Gilead, the religious regime first imagined in Margaret Atwood’s dystopian writing.
The post Stephen Colbert Says Trump Went ‘100 Percent Cage-Free Crazy’ for Easter appeared first on New York Times.
