On Feb. 6, Brittany Allyn donned a white Millia London bridal dress as she walked down the staircase at Hinwick House, a mansion in the English countryside, to the sounds of Johann Pachelbel’s Canon in D. On her wrist, she wore her “something borrowed,” a vintage silver diamond watch, and her hair hung in elegant, loose waves. Her 35 guests, which included family members and childhood friends, had traveled far and wide to celebrate with her.
The occasion? Ms. Allyn’s 40th birthday.
Ms. Allyn, a content creator based in New York, who has never been married and does not have children, who spends several months per year in London, decided that she would host a “‘Saltburn’-themed fancy, British aristocratic party” in England. Last fall, she emailed a large group of friends to gauge their interest in attending. “Immediately, I got 50 soft yeses,” she said.
Initially, Ms. Allyn didn’t set out to plan a wedding-like celebration. But she quickly realized that many of the elements she wished to include, such as speeches from guests and a slide show of baby photos, felt like moments that happen at a wedding. So, Ms. Allyn decided, “‘Why don’t I just do all the things I’ve just waited for?’”
Ms. Allyn posted several videos of her weekend-long celebration on social media, which she called her “wedding birthday,” and also included a Studio 54-themed dance party, afternoon tea and several outfit changes, reaching four million total views on TikTok and Instagram.
For some single women, the milestone 40th birthday is more than a party. Instead of waiting for a partner to justify a celebration, women are using the moment as a declaration of empowerment and self-love, complete with wedding attire, a curated guest list of their closest friends and family and the joy and excitement of a wedding.
“People are getting married later in life,” said Sarah Adair, the founder of Social Bliss Events in Nashville, who has planned several wedding-style 40th birthdays for clients. “Women deserve to celebrate such a milestone with or without a partner.”
Ms. Adair first began to receive inquiries regarding these types of parties two years ago and said that prospect consultations have doubled each year since. The planning process, she added, is “more streamlined than a wedding” and such events generally cost 10 to 30 percent of a typical wedding budget.
Sarah Jacobson, who lives in New York and works in advertising, planned a destination 40th birthday trip in Mexico City in January. Normally, a “huge birthday person,” she often coordinates a celebratory dinner or happy hour with friends. But as turning 40 approached, “I wouldn’t necessarily say I was dreading it, but I wouldn’t say I was thrilled,” Ms. Jacobson said.
At the encouragement of a friend who had previously hosted a birthday trip, Ms. Jacobson began to seriously consider the idea and reached out to a large network of friends via email. “When it came down to it, I was really surprised by how many people really committed to it, saved up for it, set aside the time,” Ms. Jacobson said.
Among the group of 12 attendees were friends from childhood, New York and work. Ms. Jacobson, who has spent extended time in Mexico City over the years, put together an itinerary that allowed for individual exploration, as well as cultural experiences — such as watching a Mexican wrestling match — and culminated in a birthday dinner at one of her favorite restaurants.
Dressed in a see-through sequin set from the Australian brand VRG GRL, Ms. Jacobson cried as she delivered a toast to her friends during the celebratory dinner.
“I wasn’t ever thinking of this as a replacement for a wedding — I don’t know if I even want a wedding,” Ms. Jacobson said. “To me, what was so special was that I had all of these people in my favorite place, which is really rare as an adult, and that aspect did feel like a wedding.”
Amanda Bart, an executive assistant in New York and a friend of Ms. Jacobson for more than a decade, was among the guests at the celebration and described the moment as “powerful.”
“So much of our adult lives are spent marking the traditional milestones you hear about your whole life — engagements, marriages, babies, first homes,” Ms. Bart, 43, said. “For women who aren’t partnered, there’s often no external occasion prompting this kind of celebration, so creating one yourself is a genuine declaration of self-worth.”
Alyssa Pettinato, the owner of Alinato Events in New York, helped her best friend plan a blowout wedding-style 40th birthday in March 2025. “Millennials like to party,” she said. “We like to show up and show out.”
Ms. Pettinato estimates that her friend, who is single and childless, spent nearly $50,000 on her 75-person affair at Le Jardinier in New York, which drew friends and family members from across the country.
Even women who have experienced more traditional life milestones are embracing wedding-style 40th birthdays. Terri Ferree, the founder of TMF Events in Los Angeles, worked with a client who is a mother of three adult children but had never been married. Ms. Ferree’s client, who was turning 40, wore a sparkly floor-length gown to the party she hosted for 80 guests last November.
The event also featured a D.J., a photographer and speeches from friends and family. “She’s like, ‘I built this life, and I did it all on my own,’” Ms. Ferree said of her client’s philosophy. “Why do I have to wait to celebrate until some man wants to marry me?”
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