After nearly seven decades of steady employment, Mr. Clean, the famously (and proudly) bald mascot for cleaning products, is doing something that is becoming increasingly rare in the United States: he’s retiring.
In a social media video posted last week, the bald and brawny (but not to be confused with the Brawny paper towel guy) corporate mascot appeared behind a lectern in sunglasses and a Hawaiian shirt, presumably having hoisted his pristine, snug, plain white tee in the rafters of the Procter & Gamble head offices.
A chyron declared his retirement. A narrator praised his “career with zero stains on the record.” It is remarkable in this day and age that someone so prominent, who’s been in the public eye for so long, has a spotless public record. Though let’s not speak too soon, as there are still millions of Epstein files yet to be released.
The next day, a screenshot from the iPhone Notes app confirmed he was leaving cleaning “in pursuit of new hobbies,” signing off with his actual, little-known first name, Veritably.
In a statement obtained by the New York Times, a spokesperson for Procter & Gamble said product packaging will remain unchanged. That sounds like he’s still going to be on the packaging, but given all of this hubbub about a “retirement,” maybe that means the packaging is going to be pretty much the same, logo and all, just without the bald neat freak on the front.
Mr. Clean was created in the 1950s when Procter & Gamble hired commercial artist Richard Black to design a mascot for a new detergent-based cleaner. His early looks were almost magical before the design settled into making them look like a retired naval officer who started a housekeeping business to eat up some of his spare time.
It’s fitting, really: In a country where pensions are all but gone, and corporate America is trying its hardest to keep people working until they are firmly in the grave, one of the few people able to retire is a fictional character.
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