Traveling has always come with complications. Our By The Way Concierge column will take your travel dilemmas to the experts to help you navigate the unexpected. Want to see your question answered? Submit it here.
“I own a couple timeshare weeks at great vacation spots. When I’m inviting a friend, should I feel obliged to give them the (larger) owner’s suite? Or should they be thankful to be invited, and enjoy the guest suite? (The owner’s suite usually has a more luxurious bathroom, a better view, a sitting area, etc.)” — Susan K., Arlington, Virginia.
We had a ritual on family trips when I was growing up: we’d arrive at our vacation rental, my parents would do a quick survey of the rooms, claim the one to their liking, and the kids would get the leftovers. We knew that the person who arranged the trip was entitled to the better room. I would assume the same rules apply in your timeshare situation, but just in case, I took your question to travel and etiquette experts.
Terika L. Haynes, owner of Dynamite Travel, told me room selection quandaries are “something that happens a lot,” no matter what kind of accommodation — timeshare, vacation rental, hotel rooms, etc. People often deal with the delicate dance in different ways; sometimes it’s as easy as whoever paid gets dibs, or someone may offer to pay more for the better room if they’re splitting a house on a group trip.
In your case, Haynes said her answer depends on a few questions. Namely, how often do you go to the timeshare? If it’s a rare treat for you, then absolutely take the suite. But if you feel like you go all the time and want to be generous, “maybe you want to make that guest’s visit extra special,” Haynes said.
Either way, “don’t feel obligated,” she added.
Lisa Richey, founder of the American Academy of Etiquette, was recently in your guest’s situation. “A friend invited me to Sundance and insisted on giving me the bigger, more luxurious room,” she said. “It was a memorable gesture and it was from her heart.”
But Richey also noted there’s no formal rule that says a host must give up the owner’s suite.
“When you are inviting someone to join you — the invitation really is the gift,” she said. “The guest is there to spend time with you and enjoy the experience.”
Alison M. Cheperdak, author of “Was it Something I Said? Everyday Etiquette to Avoid Awkward Moments in Relationships, Work, and Life,” says to think about it like you were at home. Would you give up your bedroom if you have a guest room available? Probably not!
Cheperdak and the others I polled had one caveat: if your guest has any kind of mobility issue, major health concerns, or some other needs that could benefit from a bigger room, that could be a worthy push to offer them the suite.
Whatever you pick, etiquette coach Jules Hirststresses that proper etiquette is all about making sure your guest feels “welcome, comfortable and thoughtfully considered.” The fact that you are even sending this question in the first place means that your manners are likely impeccable.
So enjoy your timeshare, you deserve it.
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