It’s been one whole month (including a two-week hiatus) since James Austin Johnson last played President Trump in an opening sketch on “Saturday Night Live,” so what the heck: That’s enough time to bring him back.
This weekend’s “S.N.L.” broadcast, hosted by Colman Domingo and featuring the musical guest Anitta, led with Johnson as Trump in the Oval Office, drafting a now-notorious social media post in which he used obscene language to threaten Iran.
Consulting with the White House press secretary, Karoline Leavitt (Ashley Padilla), Johnson said he would end the post with the phrase “Praise be to Allah.”
“It’s a sarcastic attack on the world’s largest religion,” Johnson explained to her. “They famously have a great sense of humor about that kind of stuff.”
When Padilla said that the post could create problems for her, Johnson replied, “Like I said to Pam Bondi and Kristi Noem right before I fired them, you’re doing a terrific job.” (In a meta-commentary on the sketch, Johnson added, “All three of those were played by Ashley; it’s an interesting detail.”)
Johnson then proceeded to make some “urgent phone calls,” starting with one to the golfer Tiger Woods (Kenan Thompson).
“What’s going on, buddy?” Johnson said. “Are you playing in the Masters this weekend?”
“Uh, no, sir,” Thompson answered. “I don’t know if you remember but I flipped my car and got a DUI.”
Johnson replied, “Oh, right. A dewey. As in: dewey drive on pills? Yes he do.” When Thompson started to explain that there was no golf course at the Swiss rehab facility where was staying, Johnson hung up on him in midsentence.
The next call was from a number Johnson said he didn’t recognize — it turned out to be his wife, Melania Trump (Chloe Fineman).
Speaking in the first lady’s accented English, Fineman said, “I decided I should do a big, random speech, completely out of nowhere, and say ‘I am not Epstein victim.’ Is that good?”
Johnson answered, “Darling, I’ve got to admit, that sounds a little insane. Who are you, me?”
Finally, Johnson rang up the defense secretary, Pete Hegseth (Colin Jost), whose phone played Smash Mouth’s “All Star” when he called.
“It just said Unknown Caller,” Jost explained, “so I figured I’d just answer and say a couple military secrets.”
Jost expressed concern that the United States was in peace talks with Iran at all, but Johnson told him not to worry.
“I just heard they’re going really, really bad,” Johnson said. “I sent in my secret weapon, JD Vance. After those Iranians spent 20 hours talking to JD, they said, ‘Please, sir, just go back to bombing us.’”
Pale blue dot of the week
It’s not often that the crew of a NASA-led space mission is parodied on “S.N.L.”, so consider it a victory for science that this week’s show featured a sketch lampooning the astronauts of Artemis II, who recently returned from a 700,000-mile journey around the moon and back.
The sketch featured Domingo as the pilot Victor Glover, who is trying to wax philosophical about Earth’s place in the universe, but is constantly interrupted by crew mates, whether it’s Jeremy Hansen (Marcello Hernández) and his displays of Canadian patriotism or Christina Koch (Sarah Sherman), who floats by after neglecting to Velcro herself to the wall before she falls asleep.
Yes, it may be a thin premise, but it’s adorable to watch the performers bounce around awkwardly — and video-bomb the pilot with a few airborne pranks — as they pretend to be floating in space.
Weekend Update jokes of the week
Over at the Weekend Update desk, the co-anchors Jost and Michael Che continued to riff on the peace talks between the United States and Iran.
Jost began:
Today the United States held peace negotiations with Iran. But then, just an hour ago, President Trump posted, “If Iran doesn’t agree to peace, the greatest military of all time (OURS!) will eff Iran right up their Strait of Hormuz. Asalam alaykum, you crazy bastards!!!!” Now I completely made that up, but isn’t it kind of disturbing that you all totally believed that he had posted that?
President Trump did genuinely issue a post threatening to destroy Iran’s entire civilization and then ended with the phrase, “Praise be to Allah.” I know that almost makes Trump sound like he is a radical terrorist. But remember, Trump has already been to a paradise with 72 virgins. [His screen showed an image from a 1992 video of Trump at a Mar-a-Lago party with Jeffrey Epstein.]
Che continued:
There is growing confusion over whether Israel being allowed to continue bombing Lebanon was part of the cease-fire with Iran. Ultimately, that decision comes down to the man controlling our military, Benjamin Netanyahu. Earlier tonight, JD Vance announced that the U.S. and Iran have ended negotiations without a deal after talking for 21 hours straight. And guys, I think they’re done for real, based on how his mascara’s running. [His screen showed an altered image of Vance with mascara streaming down his face.]
Jost resumed the topic:
Before the talks fell apart, President Trump warned Iran about making any more demands, saying, “The Iranians don’t seem to realize they have no cards.” They’re literally holding a strait.
Across the pond of the week
“S.N.L.” was a little light on topical comedy sketches this week (though for sheer silliness, we’d recommend this segment where Domingo plays an ostentatious fashion professor who is attempting to describe a criminal suspect to a TV news reporter).
If you’re still jonesing for a sendup of current events, the “S.N.L.” trans-Atlantic spinoff “Saturday Night Live UK” has you covered. Just a few hours earlier, the London-based “S.N.L. UK” led off with its own sketch about Melania Trump (played here by Emma Sidi of the “S.N.L. UK” cast), who crashes a suburban cookout, emerging from the shrubbery to take over the drinking games by repeatedly denying any connections to Jeffrey Epstein. As Sidi forlornly explains to the other guests, “I have no friends — since they all randomly died in a maximum-security prison.”
It’s punchy, it’s to the point and it’s under three minutes long. Maybe there’s a lesson in there somewhere.
Dave Itzkoff is a former Times culture reporter.
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